Once Upon A Love
by shizukesa-sama
Summary: After having spent months in the past. Healing and gaining new love. Harry has been ripped from it all in order to save a world he is slowly comming to hate. Now that the war is over, he is free. But he cannot forget his love of the past.
1. Prologue

Disclaimer: I do not own anything. All Characters belong to their appropriate author. Also I would like to thank the many authors on that have come before me. I have long been reading your work and thought that now I should contribute something. I would really like to thank Cole224 the author of "The Perfect Man" without whom I would not have come up with this idea. Hopefully our two stories will stay as dissimilar as possible.

Summary: After having spent months in the past. Healing from the loss of family and gaining new love. Harry has been ripped from it all in order to save a world he is slowly coming to hate. Now that the war is over, he is free. But he cannot forget his love of the past. He decides to leave and seek out a life for himself amung the muggles and the creatures that hide there themselves. Will he find his love again? Is that even possible?

_Once Upon A Love_

_Prologue_

I had to get away. There was no way that I could stay here any longer. Every time I closed my eyes I thought of him. Of how magic had taken me to him and then ripped me away. I don't even know if he survived. I always told him that I would have to leave eventually. That what we had would not be able to last. That no matter what I wanted I would not be able to stay. But how could I leave him before I knew that he was better. He was so sick.

Why did I have to leave? I would have stayed. Would have stayed with him. Forgotten about everything else. Every other obligation meant nothing. I would have left my friends, my family. Not that I really had any family left to speak of. But I would have left my whole world if it meant that I got to stay with _Him_.

Edward.

I knew I couldn't stay, that I would have to return here, but now I can not stay _here_ any longer. I have served my purpose and now I have nothing left. My friends would say otherwise. They would tell me that now I have my whole life to live. That I can now settle down, marry a nice witch, and have a family that I have always dreamed of.

They don't know. They can not understand why I am so depressed while they are all celebrating the end of the war. The end of all the death and terror. They don't understand, they cannot understand that for me, my life was over when I left him behind. That I have been only a shell since they forced me back to deal with their problems. My destiny they called it. My duty. To save them.

Duty.

I had no duty. It was not my job to save them from their mistakes and my only destiny was to try and be happy. This could not be what my mother had in mind for me when she gave her life for mine. She would not have wanted me to sacrifice my own happiness for the sake of the _"greater good!"_ But they did! They expected me to give up everything for them. They did not even give me a choice. Damn them. Why must I pay for their mistakes.

But they don't care and even if they pretend there is no way for them to understand. If I told them that I would have stayed with him, even if it meant my death, they would not understand. They would expect me to thank them for saving my life. When really all they did was tear my life away from me. I will never know if he lived. How could I? And even if I found out that he did survive, what then? He would not be alive _now_.

I must leave. I have fought their war. Bought them their freedom at the price of only my happiness. I have watched as friend and foe alike have fallen on the battle field. I have killed for them. Become a monster, for them. I know more battle spells than most Auros. I have nothing left.

They are selibrating right now. I can see the great hall a blaze with lights. I can hear their laughter and cheers even from way out here. It sickens me. That they can be so happy when they have taken it all from me. Why could they not have just left me where I was? Why could they not clean up their own mess?

The water sparkles with the light of the stars as it ripples before me. All I can think about is how the stars looked the night that I laid beside him. We were looking at the stars, laying on the grass in a meadow behind his house. I remember he turned to me, propping up on one arm to gaze at me instead of the heavens above us. I had loved him for several weeks by then. Having had a crush on him that had slowly fallen away into the madness of love since I had first layed eyes on him. It was hard to believe that I had only been there for four weeks. It had seemed like an eternity. One that I never wanted to end.

But there he was, beside me, looking far to handsome than anyone had a right to be. His eyes were the same color as mine but seemed to burrow into another soul to find out what they were thinking. He was incredibly good at knowing another thoughts and he always commented about how it was unfair that he couldn't seem to do the same with me. My oclumency training must have paid of for something. For I was deathly afraid that he would glean from me some thought about my feelings and then would shun me, breaking me. Something that no one had accomplished until they took me from him.

But he just leaned over and kissed me. Taking my breath away from me. Oh my beautifull Edward. He told me how he had been stuggling with himself. That he had been falling for me just as long as I had been for him. I had to kiss him to get him to shut up before he babbled himself into a frenzy thinking that I did not feel the same for him.

Silly boy.

But that is all over now. He is gone. I am alone. With only my memories to keep me company.

I really have to leave.

But where to go. I wont stay in England. It holds to many unpleasant memories. Not the wizarding world either. I want nothing to do with them any more. My friends do not understand how I could not want the fame. But it has cost me to much in the long run. I will go to him. Not in the way that I want to but in the only way that I can. I will go to Chicago. I will find out what happened to him and his mother. For I already know that his father succumbed to the sickness. But I can find out what happened to them.

And then...

And then I shall make my way in the muggle world. I will try to survive as best as I am able. With my soul stuck in the past. If there is one thing that I have always been good at it is surviving.

I stand. Casting one last glance out over the waters of the lake. It is time for me to leave. It will take me at least a week to pack and make arrangements but I will leave. I have only one thing in mind as I make my way back towards the castle...

Edward.


	2. I Have to Get Out of Here!

_Once Upon A Love_

_I Have to Get Out of Here!_

I stood gazing over Hogwarts lake. Sounds of merriment echoed behind me as I was lost in my thoughts. I hated it here and I hated them. My one time friends. Hated them for taking me away from the only good thing in my life. Even more I hated them for not understanding what they had done to me. But then I had never told them about what had happened that summer when I had disappeared from my relatives home in Surrey. Never told them what had happened in the past. I could barely even think about it so how could I possibly share it. How could I possibly share _him_ with _them_.

I turned and made my way back to the castle. I had made up my mind. I was leaving. Leaving this hypocritical world that had done nothing but take, take, take from me until I had nothing left.

I had decided.

I would leave for the Americas as soon as possible. I would journey to Chicago and find out what had become of the last of my family. Light glittered of the gold chain around my neck. I reached up and held the ring that hung there. The Claudah. The Celtic wedding ring. Given to me in promise. A promise of forever. Something that the both of us had known we could never have.

"Harry! Hey Harry!"

I turned to face my one time friends. Ron and Hermione we making their way out of the great hall and towards me. Both of them had giant smiles on their faces. I withheld my disgust. They would never understand. They still had each other. And for them that was all that mattered.

"Harry, come on. Everyone is waiting for you." Ron exclaimed as he grabbed my arm. "Where have you been? Everyone wants to shake the hand of the Man-Who-Saved-Us-All. Your being rude just to leave them hanging, mate."

Could they come up with a worse name? And could they not see that he wanted to be left alone. That none of the fame mattered to him? "No Ron. I am not going to the ball. I want nothing to do with them!"

"Harry! Now really, that's enough! You have been sulking around for the past year. Enough is enough. Everyone has sacrificed a great deal to get to this point and I think that it is very selfish of you to deny them their celebration after all that we have been through!" Aw Hermione. Always tyring to be the voice of reason but this time just like all of the other times, it only made me mad. But unlike the other times, where I held my tongue, this time I would not be silent.

"Your right Hermione." I could see her swell with pride at being declared right, yet again. "Enough is enough. And I have had enough!"

Her face fell and she took a step back. Ron also released my arm and turned to look at me.

"Whats up with you mate?"

"I Have had enough! It isn't enough that I won your war for you. That you drug me from the past. A past where I was finally happy. It wasn't enough that you refused to send me back claiming that 'only you can save us, harry! Don't be so selfish!'" My sarcasm must be getting to them as they did not interrupt me. "It wasn't enough that you forced me to fight when all I wanted to do was die. It wasn't enough that I was forced to learn spells that would turn even Voldemort's head, and all for the 'greater good'! No that wasn't enough, you still want more from me.

"You still want me to cander to the masses. Accept praise for all those that I killed in order to get you where you wanted to be. You call me selfish for wanting to be left alone. Do you not think that I have earned that right by now?"

I was yelling at them by this point and I could hear the silence all around me as those who were in the great hall now stood around to listen. There was no music playing and to laughing. I smirked to myself. Maybe they would finally understand.

I douted it.

"What are you taking about Harry? Why would you want to be alone, now that we have finally won? You can settle down now. Marry Ginny and have that family that you have always dreamed about."

"Yeah mate! Ginny has been waiting for you for a long time. And I know that you have been keeping a ring for her. Why else would you wear it around you neck like that for the past year?"

Ginny stepped forward now. I could just see her thoughts. Thoughts of how I would now propose to her and how she would then become Mrs. Harry Potter. My so called friends didn't care if that was what I really wanted or not. Only that their view of the perfect happy ending played out.

"That ring is mine, Ron." That seemed to stop her in her tracks.

"What do you mean Harry?" Ginny asked, I could see her lip start to quiver. Damn manipulative woman. Thinking that a few tears would get her way. Well not from me. I refused to be with anyone besides the one who gave me this ring, my Edward.

"I mean that this is my ring. I mean that it will never be yours. I mean that I will never be asking you to be my wife because my heart belongs to another." I was cut off by a very angry Hermione as a very tearful Ginny wailed loudly in the background.

"How can you be so mean Harry? You know that Ginny has been in love with you since before we stared Hogwarts. How can you treat her this way. Telling her that you love another, when you know that she has been waiting just for you. How could you lead her on like that?"

"Lead her on? Lead her on!? When did I ever say that I was ever interested in her? For the past year I have done nothing but fight your war for you. I had no time to entertain flights of fancy even if I had wanted to! No I never gave her any cause to think that we would ever be together. That was all her! And you only encouraged her. You never took my opinion into consideration at all. I don't even like girls Hermione."

She gasped and took a step back. I really don't understand why she found this so shocking as really it was no problem in the wizarding world. One potion and valla instant heir. Well maybe not so instant but you get my point. Some men, bearers, could even go without the potion. But here she was acting as if it was the end of the world.

"What? But? You can't! You have to marry Ginny. What would their family do with you you?" Okay, say what? What does that have to do with the price of fish?

"What are you talking about Hermione.?"

"You have to marry Ginny so that the family can have access to you vaults!" She gasped and through her hand over her mouth. I guess she wasn't supposed to have said that out loud.

"Oh is that how it is then? I must first give up every happiness I could ever have, first with my parents, then with Sirius, then Edward, all for the sake of your little war, and now I must give up myself to so that you can get access to my _money_?" Oh I was mad. This has gone on long enough. If I hadn't decided to leave before, I certainly had now.

"Who is Edward?" Ginny's tear filled voice reached my ears as I stood there fuming.

"Edward is the one who gave me this ring. He is the one that you all selfishly ripped from me when you decided to drag me from the past and refused to send me back. It might be to late to send me back now but that does not mean that I will give anymore of myself to you and yours to be used and abused. I am done!"

"What do you mean mate? After all that we have done for you, you are going to turn your backs on us?"

I could not believe what I was hearing. "After all that _you_ have done for _Me_?" I echoed incredulously. "What have you done for me that I have not repaid a thousand fold?" He did not answer. I think the fact that I was so angry I was shaking was finally getting through to them. That or the fact that every piece of glass was vibrating violently.

"I have had enough of your hypocritical nonsense. Both from my so called friends and the rest of the wizarding world. I am leaving. I can no longer stay here and as I cannot get to the place that I want to be I will be leaving to be anywhere else but _here!_"

I turned to leave heading up the stairs to pack. I would leave tonight. Head towards London and the bank and hopefully be gone before the day is through. To hell with planning it out. I needed to leave before I did something that would get me arrested.

"Harry wait!" Hermione's voice followed me through the corridoors. "Harry! Wait! Harry I'm sorry. Don't go!"

I ignored her until I had made it all the way to the Gryfindor common room. She met me on the stairs and followed me into my room. I had been given my own room, what with the war and all. She stared at me as I started to pack the few belongings that were not always in the trunk that passed as an earring in my left ear. It was not until I had everything packed and was making my way past her again that she seemed to realize that I was serious and really meant to leave.

"Harry, you don't have to leave. We don't mean for you to think that we don't care about your feelings. Really, I am trying to understand." She had tears in her eyes. She really wasn't a bad person, but she couldn't get around the fact that what I want might just be different than what she had in mind for me. I could no longer live with her and the others playing my keeper. And I knew that if I didn't leave now that I never would. They would keep me here to be their poster boy or scapegoat.

"No Hermione. I do have to go. I can no longer stay here with all these hypocrites. I gave everything I had for them and now it is time for me to think about myself. It is time for me to be selfish, as you called me."

"Oh Harry, Im sorry. I didn't mean it. Its just that you are always so depressed, even though we won. Why did you not tell us that you had found someone in the past?"

"Would it really have made any difference? Would you have let me go back?" She had no answer for that and I knew that she wouldn't have. They could not have afforded to let me go and fight their own war. "No you know that it wouldn't have made any difference. But now it is time for me to leave. Maybe I will be able to find someplace else to belong. someplace I can live out the rest of my days in peace and quiet."

"Where will you go Harry?" She seemed sad and small. A part of me, one that still saw her as my friend, the part that remembered the better days when we first started out felt sorry for her.

"Chicago." I could give her that much. "But I wont be staying there."

"Why not? Why go there in the first place then?" She looked confused. I knew that she hated being confused, at not knowing something.

"That is where Edward lived. I am going to find out what happened to him. How his life panned out. Then I will move on. Find someplace out of the way were I can be alone. Maybe I'll finish out my muggle education."

"Oh Harry. I trully am sorry for everything."

"I know Hermione. I know." We were at the edge of the wards now. This was it. I was finally leaving. "I have to go. I don't think that you will hear from me again Hermione. But you were my friend and I want to wish you well."

She smiled through her tears and nodded her head. Finally someone was understanding, if only a little.

"Good bye Harry. I hope that you find what you are looking for."

"Me too, Hermione. Me too." I gave her a small hug. I never had been big on physical contact until I had met Edward and then it had still only just been him.

I took a step back giving her a brief smile before I apparated away, leaving her standing alone at the edge of my once home.

Hogwarts.


	3. I'm Leavingon a Jet Plane

_Once Upon A Love_

_I`m Leaving....on a Jet Plane_

I stood there, just looking at the departure board. I was really doing it. I was really leaving. It had been an eventful 24 hours. That was all i really could say about it. Thinking back on it now however, I really did expect it to be more difficult to leave. I mean after that display at the ball I expected someone to put up more of a fight, but I guess that I had served my purpose and now they were willing to let me alone. Oh I am sure that they would miss their entertainment and eventually, they would miss their little scapegoat but for now no one was stopping me.

They had had their chance when I had gone to Gringotts. It didn't stop me then and it wont stop me now. I am getting on that plane.

I can hear the final call for my flight as I make my way over to hand in my ticket.

"First time flying out of the country, sir?" She is way too peppy.

"Yes, I think it is time that I visited my family." My voice must have a tone of sadness to it because she looks at me with a sort of pity. I hate that.

"Well I hope that when you meet up with them that they are well."

"I am sure that when I finally do meet up with them, all will be well." I make sure not to look her in the eyes as I say this, taking my ticket stub and moving on towards the plane.

'All will be well.' What a load of bull. Nothing would be well for a very long time. It would be years before I would have the chance to see any of my loved ones again. If I ever did. I had to wonder if I would ever see my parents again. Or Sirius.

Or Edward.

No. I would probably never see them again. I have done to many terrible things to be let into heaven. To many atrocities. Not to mention what I had to give up in order to win their war for those hypocritical bastards. No I gave up any chance of seeing them again the moment that spell left my lips. And the hardest part was that I knew it at the time too. But then again, I was hoping that the spell would kill me.

I shake my head to clear it of such thoughts. I would not be thinking of that horible spell nor its consiquences right now.

I took my seat and glanced out of the window. We would be moving soon. I knew that I was one of the last passengers to board. I leaned back in my seat and closed my eyes. I have 8 hours before I will reach Chicago. 8 hours with nothing but my thoughts to keep me company. Well at least I was flying over the Atlantic and not the Pacific, that would be 12 hours and I am not sure that I can manage the 8 hours that I have now.

We are taking off now. The force of the plane as it moves pushing me back into my seat. It wouldn't be long now. I am glad that the goblins could be as accommodating as they were. I don't think that I could have stayed in London one moment longer. Plus it would have just given the Weasleys another opportunity to try and get me to marry their daughter. I can not believe the stunt that they already tried to pull. I guess that it is a good thing that Edward gave me the Claudah instead of just any ring. It really saved me there.

I walked into Gringotts after having stood and stared at it for what must have been the longest time. I was affaid to go in because that ment that there was no turning back. Who was I kidding, there was no turning back long before this.

I walked up to the teller and waited in line until one was available. I knew that I could push my way to the front and, once the angered witch or wizard saw who it was that butted their way forward, they would simply back off and let me pass. It was one thing that I hated most about these people. They let others walk right over them. With a smile.

The goblin looked down his nose at me while he asked gruffly what I wanted. I in turn replied that I needed to speak to someone about my accounts. He directed me to a small waiting room and told me to take a seat.

"Griffinger will be right with you." And then he was gone.

"Ah, Mr. Potter. What can I do for you today." A stout old goblin walked into the room.

"I am leaving England and need to make arraignments to have access to my funds. Either by moving all of my money into a muggle bank account or to find out if Gringotts has any other solution." I tried to be as polite as possible. These were the ones handling my money, I really could not understand how wizards could treats them any way but with the up most courtesy. I guess that is only one more example of wizarding stupidity.

"Ah, I see. Yes Mr. Potter, I do have another suggestion. You see, we at Gringotts are not so behind the times as your fellow wizards like to think we are. I can simply transfer your funds to our muggle branch. Muggles have so many investment opportunities that we simply could not give up the chance to capitalize on them."

"That would be wonderfull Mr. Griffinger. Would it also be possible to get a statement for my account. I am affraid that I really have no idea about how much I have. Only that my parents and Sirius left me money when they died."

Griffinger frowned as he heard me say this. "I am afraid Mr. Potter that I do not quite understand. We at Gringotts have been sending you a yearly statement since your eleventh birthday and before that your magical guardian received the yearly update."

I was floored. "Who was my magical guardian and is that anything like my muggle guardians?"

"Muggle guardians? Who ever heard of such a thing. It is quite illegal Mr. Potter to knowingly place a magical child into the hands of muggles. No matter who they are."

"I see." And really I did see but I felt the need to ask anyway. To have my suspicions confirmed. I always knew I was only a weapon to them. "And just who was my magical guardian?"

"Why Proffessor Dumbledor, of course."

"Of course. I am afraid Mr. Griffinger, that I have never had a statement from Gringotts ever delivered to me and as I did spend over 16 years in the company of my muggle relatives I am quite certain that they never received on in my stead either. But as that cannot be changed why don't we just look at one now so that I may make the necessary changes and leave this country once and for all."

"That is most disconcerting Mr. Potter. If you wish, we could bring them up on criminal charges, however, that would as you said, not change anything." I nodded to him. It would not change anything or if it did, it would only mean that I would have to stay longer in this wretched country. "Well then, lets continue. Your parents have left you a rather large fortune and what with your inheritance from your godfather, a Mr Sirius Black, your total monetary assets proceed in an excess of 3 million Gallions. Not bad for one of your standing."

I was floored. I knew I had money but nothing like what Griffinger was telling me. "How much does that convert over into muggle money? Both in pounds and dollers please." I sat back in my seat as the goblin converted the money.

"It would be roughly 6 million pounds and 18 million dollars, what with it being 3 dollars for every pound. I doubt that you could spend that much in one lifetime Mr Potter."

I nodded. I didn't think that I could either. But then my lifetime, knowing my luck, would be a rather long time. "Are there any other assets that I should be made aware of?"

"Yes. You have a number of properties from your families holdings spread across the globe, but this is odd... Mr Potter, did you by any chance get married recently?"

What an odd question. No. No it was impossible.

"Why do you ask?"

"Because right here it says that you are entitled to the Masen family home. Even though it is noted to currently be owned by a grandson of the Masen line. No where in your family history has the Masen line merged with the Potter line. This could only be the case if _you _in fact had married into that line. This is most confusing."

Yes confusing. I had never had the opportunity to marry Edward. It was not legal in the time that he lived. The closest we could get was when he gave me the Claudah.

But that would mean.

Edward had magic.

Impossible.

A squib. Edward had been a squib.

"No. We never married. I am sure that you remember how I went missing last summer." I paused waiting for him to nod. "Well the rumors that I had been stuck in the past were, for once, completely true. During that time I was taken in by the Masens and ended up falling for their only son, Edward Masen. I do not believe that he knew that his family had any connection to magic or that they had any contact with the wizarding world, because if that was so then they would not have been hit by the epidemic that swept through the city. The father, I know, died from that disease.

But I am getting off topic. During the time I was there, as I mentioned, I fell in love with Edward Masen and he with me. Because it was impossible for us to marry and because I was unaware of the fact that we could bond, for I had never told him that I was, in fact, a wizard; he gave me this ring." I held up the Claudah for Griffinger to see.

"Ah, that explains it then. No Mr Potter, you are quite right in saying that you never bonded with your mate, but because he gave you a Claudah, a Celtic Wedding ring, in the eyes of the ministry and magic you had what could be called a civil marriage. Married in name but not in magic. You really should have been introducing your self as Harry James Potter Masen, or just Harry Masen if you prefer."

Harry Masen.

I was floored. I sat back stiffly in my seat. Many times both in the past and present I had dreamed about what it would be like taking my lovers name. I never dreamed that I actually _had._ The fact that we never even knew. That _he_ would never know. It was a sort of cruel irony.

"I can't believe it. Is it even possible?"

The goblin remained silent as I tried to process the information. Wait. He said that a grandson currently owned the Masen family home. If that was true then their might be someone who could tell me what had become of Edward. I mean, I know he would of had to move on if there was now a grandson but I still wanted to know how is life was. If he had been happy. It would kill me to know that he had, but at the same time it would kill me to know that he hadn't.

I shook myself out of my thoughts. There would be time for all of this later. Right now I had to settle matter financially before I could start tracking down this elusive Masen.

"Mr. Griffinger. I thank you for telling me, it is most welcomed news. Even if the circumstances are not. I will need several things from you. I will need a list of all the properties that I own throughout the world. I also need any information that you might be able to find on that Masen grandson. I intend to track him down so that I might find out if he knows what happened to his grandfather, my mate, Edward Masen. I then need for you to Transfer my funds into muggle dollars and if possible help me find a bank to deal with in the muggle world."

I tried to keep my composure as I did what needed to be done. There would be time later to absorb the fact that I was married and that_ he_ would never know.

"Yes. Mr Masen. First things first. Transferring your funds into muggle dollars is quite doable but you might want to leave some Gallions behind to handle the money transfers that you already have in place."

Say what?

"Mr Griffinger. I am afraid that I have no idea what you are talking about. What transfers?"

"Why the ones that you had your guardian set up. There is a monthly transfer of one thousand gallions to the accounts of a Mr Ron and Miss Ginny Weasley, respectively. Then there is the two thousand gallions a month that are being placed in a separate vault for Mrs Weasley, this vault is independent to the Weasley family vault. Then we have five thousand gallions a month being transferred to a charity called the Bird Watchers Club. Then there is the five thousand gallions a month being transferred to your guardian for your up keep. Odd, this transfer should have been ended last month when you turned seventeen. I will make a note of that. And Finally we have a transfer that your parents set up giving one thousand gallions a month to the account of a Mr Remus Lupin, which is indeed odd as Mr Lupin passed away during the final battle of Hogwarts almost two months ago. I will make a note of that as well."

I could not believe my ears. _The Bird Watchers Club!_ How dare they. Had they not taken enough from me that they had to steal my money too.

"I want all transfers stopped immediately. I gave no such authorization. I suppose that there is no way of getting that money back without laying criminal charges, and that would only take up my time." The goblin nodded. "Well then, stop the transfers and see to it that they are not allowed anywhere near my vaults again. Now to continue, the muggle money?"

"Ah yes. You see Mr Masen, I mentioned earlier that we have a muggle branch. I will simply make a note in your accounts that you will be dealing strictly with that branch, as well as giving you a muggle debit and credit card, and you will be free to leave whenever you wish. For a small fee, we at Gringotts can also get you muggle identification as well as a passport and visa."

"I would very much appreciate that Mr Griffinger. Now I believe that our last order of business would be that list of properties and any information that you might have pertaining to that Masen Grandson."

"Right you are Mr Masen. If you would just kindly wait here I will have one of the goblins get to work on your identification and another on gathering any information that we have on the young master Masen. Is there anything else that I can do for you while you wait?"

"If it is at all possible for you to book me a flight to Chicago, leaving as soon as possible, then I will have nothing more to do before I leave."

"Yes that is quite possible Mr Masen." A list popped up in front of him. "Ah, here is your list of properties. I will just leave you to look over them as I see to your other matters."

"Yes that will be fine, thank you."

Griffinger got up and left the office leaving me alone with my whirlwind thoughts. I was really doing this. I was really leaving and I even had a solid lead to finding out about my family. _Edward_.I still couldn't grasp the fact that I married him. Who know that our promise of forever had that type of backing. It broke my heart to know that he would never find out. He had told me that he wished for nothing more than that he could marry me. Give me his name. And he had, we just never knew.

Shaking my head to clear it of thoughts best left for later, I took a look down at the list of properties. The one that stood out was number 12. The black house. It had a note next to it that said that it was currently being used by the bird watcher club. Well I would put a stop to that soon enough. If they wanted to steal my money and use my house then they could darn well pay rent.

I quickly glanced down the rest of the list. there were half a dozen properties scattered across the globe. I would probably visit all of them at some point in my life.

**England**

Potter Family Home

Black Manson - Number 12 - currently occupied by the Bird Watchers Club

**France**

Darkholme Villa - Cost of south France

**Russia**

Glazgou Apartments - Currently rented out to the muggle inhabitants

**Spain**

Saint Maria Cathedral - Central Spain

**Alaska**

White Hunting Cabin - Ancorhead

**Texas**

Maiden Ranch - located south of Huston

**Washington**

Small Hunting Cabin - located near Forks and Port Angelus

*It should also be noted that Mr Masen is entitled to the Masen Family Home in Chicago

Well at least I had a variety of places to chose from. I would just stay at a hotel until I could get in contact with the Masen Grandson. I really needed to find out his name. Calling him the Masen Grandson was getting old very fast. I looked up as Griffinger came back into the room.

"Here you are Mr Masen. These here are your bank cards and information. And these here are your ID and your passport. I took the liberty of using your married name."

I looked down at the Drivers Licence. My picture stared back at me along with my full name; Harry James Potter Masen. Good thing that I never planed on getting married again because then my name would become even more of a mouthful.

"Also here is your ticket form Heathrow to Chicago. It leaves this evening at 6pm so you should get there by 5:30 at the absolute latest. Is there anything else that I can do for you today Mr Masen." I smiled.

"You have been quite helpful today Mr Griffinger. I have only one more item of business and then I shall be out of your hair. I noticed that one of my properties are being used by the bird watchers club and I only thought it fair that they start paying rent. Don't you?" A evil sort of smile formed across the goblins face.

"Yes Mr Masen, indeed I do. I will get right on that. I wish you a pleasant trip and best of luck for your future. May you always find gold."

"May your coffers never empty Griffinger. I will bid you good day."

I stood, shaking his hand and made to leave his office when a horrid sound seemed to shake the entire building.

"Where is he? I know he's here. Make him come out this instant. I have a contract here that says he must marry my daughter."

Good Lord. Why did I never realize how much of a banshee that woman is and what is this about marring her daughter? I would never marry Ginny. Even if she was the last person on earth.

"Where is he? Ah, there you are. You are to come with me this instant and stop being so foolish. I have a contract here signed by your magical guardian and you are to marry Ginny as soon as possible. Until then you will be staying at the burrow with us. Now come along." Mrs Weasley was in a right state and only seemed to be getting madder the longer that I stood there staring at her. I mean really she could not be so thick as to think that I would just give in, just like that? Could she?

"Madam. When have I ever given even the slightest impression that I would ever marry your daughter? There must be some mistake." This only seemed to make her even madder and seemed to gather herself up in order to release her temper on me. The two that she had brought with her seemed content to just let her go at it. Ron stood in the corner his face rather smug while Ginny seemed to be suppressing a smile. The kind of smile one might have when they secretly knew that all of their hopes and dreams were about to become a reality.

"That does not matter, there has been no mistake boy. I have here a contract that demands that you marry Ginny. It states here that you are to marry her after your seventeenth birthday and before you eighteenth. You have no say in the matter young man. Now come along."

"May I see that contract for a moment Madam? Thank you" Griffinger came up to Mrs Weasley and took the contract from her hand and started to read. I looked on silently. This just could not be happening. "Ah, it seems that Mr Masen is indeed correct. There has been some mistake. You see madam, this contract was written after the summer in which Mr Masen disappeared. Therefore this contract is invalid."

Thank goodness. I was starting to get worried but the worst was not over yet.

"Invalid? How can that contract be invalid? It was written by his magical guardian. It cannot get more valid than that!"

"Ah but you see madam, that is where you have the problem. You see Mr Masen married during his time away and thus his magical guardian ceased to have any legal say in his life when his husband took over that role. So quite clearly this contract is invalid?"

"I don't understand. Just who is Mr Masen and why would his being married affect the marriage of Harry Potter and my daughter?"

I think that I like a confused Mrs Weasley. She is not as loud.

"Mr Masen is the name that Mr potter took when he married last summer. So you see it would be quite impossible for him to now marry your daughter."

I would have to make sure to give Griffinger a bonus. That was positively Slytherin. Yes I was married but Edward... I couldn't finish that thought. Needless to say Griffinger gave nothing away to the fact that in all probability I was really in fact a widow.

Mrs Weasley was doing a nice impression of a fish and seemed to be shocked into silence. It was quite enjoyable. Ron on the other hand seemed to only be able to sputter angrily from his corner. It was Ginny that I found most amusing. It seemed that she couldn't decide on wither or not so sob loudly or to talk nonsensically through her hiccups.

"What? How? When? Why? Harry you-you were sup-supposed t-to marry-marry me?" She wailed. It was like nails on a chalk board.

"Ginny. Let it go. I will not be marrying you. Not now nor in the future." She only seemed to sob louder. Ron also seemed to have enough and found his voice.

"What is Perfect Potter to good for the likes of us poor little pure bloods? Letting your fame get to your head that you can't marry the girls who had loved you since she was a little girl? Think your so high and mighty."

I cut him off.

"No Ron that would be you. You are the one who has always let fame get to your head and you have proven that to me time and time again. This is not about me marrying your sister, is it Ron? This is about you getting your fifteen minuets of fame and of course the money. Well you have gotten all the money you shall ever get from me. I am leaving Ron. I am Leaving and I am never coming back. The wizarding world is yours to do with what you please but I will not be coming back to clean up your messes again. I am through, done, gone."

He seemed to only be able to star at me. I turned to look at Griffinger.

"Thank you for all of your help today Griffinger. I will be in touch if I require more assistance. I bid you good day."

"Again a Good day to you as well Mr Masen. Oh and before I forget, here is the information you wanted about the Masen line. There is also a contact number for the lawyer who is in charge of the estate. He should be able to get you in contact with the Masen in question."

"Thank you again my friend. My you always find gold."

"And may you find what you are looking for Mr Masen. Good day."

With that I turned and walked out of Gringotts, leaving a stunned bunch of Weasleys behind me. It would be good to see the back of this wretched country once and for all.

I spent another hour quickly and quietly shopping in Diagon Ally, knowing that I would never be returning. I bought mostly books and some muggle style clothing that were resistant to the elements as those were the only things that I would really need now that I was leaving for good. then I made my way to the airport.

I could feel someone give my shoulder a shake and I looked over to see the flight attendant. "We will be landing in Chicago soon. Would you please fasten your seat belt and put your seat up?" She asked me with a smile. I nod to her in replay and do as I was asked. My thoughts seemed to have taken up the entire 8 hour flight. I can not say that I am disappointed. Now all I had to do was find a place to stay for a few days and make contact with that lawyer. That and I planed to visit the Masen home and Family plot. I figure I can do that with out meeting this mysterious Masen Grandson. I really need to find out his name. Maybe it is in that envelope that Griffinger gave me before I left.

I open the envelope and retrieve the pages inside. I glance over them as I feel the plane begin to make its final decent.

I freeze.

It is not Possible.

Fate must really hate me. Or it really has a cruel sense of irony. It wants me to be haunted by my past for the rest of eternity. That could be the only explanation. I mean what is the chances of the Masen grandson having the same name as my Edward. This must be just someones ideal of a cruel joke. I am in a daze as I exit the plane. It is hard to believe the words written on the page but really there is no escaping it. That illusive name for the Masen grandson.

Edward Cullen.


	4. Holding Out For You

_Once Upon A Love_

_Holding Out For You_

It has been two days. Two days since I arrived in Chicago. The Windy City. I am currently staying in a hotel just blocks from the Masen house. I just can't seem to bring myself to venture over there. I don't know what I will find and to tell the truth that scares me. I want to find out what happened. I want nothing more that to just turn back time itself but what then? Once I find out all my answers, once I find this Edward Cullen, what then? What will be left for me then?

Nothing.

I will have nothing.

I sigh and turn away from the window that I have been staring out of for the better part of the two days. I can't just stay here I reason to myself. Heading to the coffee table I pick up Griffinger's envelope and take out the papers inside. There is no contact information for Edward Cullen, only for his lawyer. I glance over the information. The lawyer is stationed here in Chicago. Well that had to be a good sign at least.

I pick up the hotel phone and start to dial the number. I would make an appointment to see the lawyer sometime today if possible and then I would take a trip down to the Masen Family Plot. I had been dreading doing that. I knew that I would find Edwards grave. It only made sense that he would be buried there along with the rest of his family. I knew that there was no way that he could still be alive because if he was then this Edward Cullen would not have the Masen house. _My_ Edward would.

The phone rang three times before a peppy secretary answered. I explain that my name is Harry Masen and that I am hoping to set up an appointment with a Mr Lessinger to go over some family matters pertaining to the Masen estate. By the time I hung up I had an appointment for three this afternoon. I looked at the clock. It was two now. I would have to leave now in order to get there on time.

It turns out that the lawyers office wasn't too far from where I am staying so now I am stuck sitting in this stuffy little waiting room for another twenty minuets. Fun. While I wait I run over everything that I want to discuss with Mr Lessinger, I hope he is able to help me. Right now I think that he must be scrambling to find out who this mysterious Masen is and how to protect his client. Really if I had wanted to steal the Masen family home from Edwards relative I would have sent Griffinger after them, not come myself. Never mess with a goblin.

The door to the office opens and an old man exits. "Ah Mr Masen. I must say that this is a very unxepected surprise. I am Mr Lessinger. Wont you join me in my office?" I nodd and stand to follow him. He is an odd sort of man. Rather short. I could almost picture him as a goblin, he had that sly look about him. At the same time though he seemed friendly, in a as long as you don't hurt mine I wont hurt yours kind of way.

"Now wont you please have a seat and tell me what I can do for you today?"

"Well Mr Lessinger, as you must know by know my name is Harry Masen and I hold a connection to the Masen family of whom, I am told, you are responsible for their estate. Is that correct?"

"Yes quite right, quite right. But I am afraid that I still do not know why you are here. If it is to contest the estate I can assure you that you would have no legal standing as it has been passed down the direct Masen line since 1918 when an Edward Masen Sr passed away due to the Spanish influenza and his son Edward Masen inherited the estate."

See I was right. What is it with people and always jumping to conclusions. Sometimes humans are just too predictable. I winse slightly when he mentions Edward. I don't believe that he noticed though.

"Mr Lessinger. I have no intention of contesting the rights to the estate. That is not why I am here."

"Then pray tell me, why are you here then if not to try to gain the estate for your self Mr Masen."

Great he is suspicious of me. Probably thinks that I am going to try and get any information that I can and then take this matter to my own lawyer and fight a Court battle. Are all people greedy or just the ones that he has to deal with?

"I am am here Mr Lessinger because you are the only contact my people could find for the Masen family. You see I have no interest in claiming the Masen estate, I have quite enough on my own thank you very much without steeling from others. But I am an orphan and family means a lot to me. I am interested in finding out about my family. Particularly my heritage. I am trying to find a way to get in contact with Edward Cullen, last of the direct Masen line in order to find out that information."

This seemed to shock him for a moment.

"I see. Well then. I will not be able to just give you the information that you are asking for you must understand. However, I will get in touch with Mr Cullen and see what he has to say about the matter. If he is alright with it I will provide you with the information he allows me give you. Does that seem acceptable Mr Masen?"

Well at least it was a start. I just realized how my request must sound to someone who did not know all the information, who could not know all the information. I mean it was not like I could tell him or this Edward Cullen that I had gone back in time, married Edward Masen, was brought forward in time, and know wanted to know that had happened to my Husband. They would lock me up and through away the key.

"Well then, given the time, I will try to make that call right now. If you would like to take a seat over on the couch over there you may wait in the room." He gestured to a black leather couch on the far side of the room. For most this would be far enough away that a person would not be able to hear much if any of either side of the conversation, but for me my hearing was better than the average humans hearing. While I would not be able to hear what took place on the other side of the phone, I would be able to hear Mr Lessinger quite fine. I nodded though and moved to take a seat trying to not look like I was paying him any attention.

"Hello, Carlise Cullen? This is Mr Lessinger from Lessinger and sons. I head the Masen estate here in Chicago, I was hoping to talk to Edward Cullen if he was available?"

Who is Carlise? Edward Cullen's father? Which brought a new question, if Edward Cullen was a direct descendant from my Edward why didn't he use the Masen name?

"No, no. Nothing is that matter. I just have a young gentleman here, a Mr Masen, who is looking for some information into the Masen family."

"Yes, thats right. I told him that myself and he clams to not want it. I really should be speaking to Edward is he available?"

"Yes I'll wait."

I was getting very nervous. What if Edward Cullen refused to speak to me? What then? I could get a goblin to track him down for me but what good would that do if he already refused once?

"Ah Edward. How are you?"

"Good, Good. Well as your father might have told you I have a young gentleman here who is claiming to be a relative of yours."

"No. He clames to only be after information."

"Looking into his family tree it seems."

"Yes he seems trustworthy to me. Claims to already have his own fortune and was quite upset that I gave the impression that he was out to steal yours."

Could this get any more stressful?

"Yes I will tell him. Where are you located now? I know that your father likes to move around a lot."

"Alright, got it. Thank you Edward. I must say that given what I have seen so far I would expect for you to see him within the week, two at the very most."

Does that mean what I think it means?

"Yes, yes. Well good day to you, Edward."

He hung up the phone, taking one final glance to the paper he had been writing on. "Well Mr Masen, it seems that you are in luck." I walk back over to his desk and take a seat in front of him again. "Mr Cullen has agreed to meet with you. However, he cannot take time way from school to do so. Therefore you will have to go to him. I do not know what you are doing with your own schooling so you might have to wait until the next vacation but never the less."

I took this moment to reassure Mr Lessinger. "That will be alright. You see I have just moved here from England and have not found a school to start at yet. I was planning to find out and get in contact with Edward Cullen before I decided on where to live myself. I did not know how long this would take so I have not made any definite plans."

"Ah well that makes sense. You seem to have a good head on your shoulders, I will give you that. Well then here is what I think you should do." He sat back in his seat. "I have here the address for Mr Cullen. He currently lives on the Olympic Pinisula in a small town called Forks in Washinton. I would sugest that you enrol in school there, as a young man like you ought to be in school. That way you might spend time learning about your family instead of trying to rush it."

"That sounds like a marvelous idea Mr Lessinger and it just so happens that I have a small cabin out by Forks. Nothing much but it will do to live in for the time being. Thank you very much for idea." This is just too great. I would be able to start my muggle education and find out what happened to Edward all at the same time. I just hope that this Edward Cullen did not think that I was trying to invade upon his life. If so, then I guess that I would stay just long enough to get the information before moving on. No need to make more enemies than I already have.

"If you would like Mr Masen, I will get in contact with Forks High School and make arraignments for your attendance."

"Yes thank you. That would be very kind of you."

"When do you think that you will be able to be there?"

"Well, I was planning on visiting the Masen Family Plot later today but other than that I have no other plans. I could leave tomorrow."

Could leave? Hell I will leave as soon as I have been to the cemetery. I will not be passing this opportunity up.

"Very well. As today is Monday, how about I enrol you to start Wednesday? Or is that too soon? We could do Thursday or Friday. Or even wait until next Monday if you need more time to move and settle in?"

"No, no. There is no need to wait. Wednesday will be fine. As I said I have no other plans and will leave either tonight or tomorrow. Whenever I can get a flight."

"Very well. I will make the call after you leave. Judging by the time, there should still be someone in the office. I will bid you good day Mr Masen." He stood to shake my hand and see me to the door.

"Thank you sir, and a good day to you as well."

With that I took my leave. As I walked away from the office my mind tried to process the thought that within seventy-two hours I would possibly get my first sight of Edward Cullen, grandson of my Edward. Oh this could get awkward very fast if I kept thinking like that. I let out a small laugh. I decided that I would go grab a bite to eat and then head over to the cemetery. I could order my tickets on the way to get my food.

I decided on a small deli just a block from the house. I would stop there before heading out back to the cemitary. I have many happy memories scattered throughout that house. I hoped that the great oak tree was still in the back gardin. It had been under that tree that Edward had given me my ring and made me the promise of forever. I let out a small shaky laugh.

Forever.

We would not have forever. It was impossible now. We would not even have the next life to look forward to. The war with Voldemort had seen to that. I would just have to live with my memories.

Taking a bite out of my sandwich, which seemed to turn to sawdust in my mouth along with my depressing thoughts, I pulled out my cell phone. I dialed the number for a local travel agency and waited for someone to pick up. What was with all these peppy secretaries. They just all seemed to happy for their own good.

"Yes. I would like to book a flight to Forks, Washington please." I wait calmly while she pulls the information up on her computer. "Yes today would be best." I am politely told that the only flight to Port Angelus leaves at ten this evening and that it would be an hours drive from their to Forks. "Thank you. Please book me on that flight and if you could please have a rental car waiting for me when I get there that would be wonderful." I am informed that it is possible and wait while she fills out the forms. I then give her my credit information and I am finished. I will be in forks by three tomorrow morning. That is fine by me. I will just sleep most of tomorrow and get the cabin in livable conditions. With an all to peppy 'Hope you enjoy your trip' the conversation was over and all I have to do now is get to the airport by nine. This leaves me plenty of time to go over to the house as it is only about five-thirty.

On my way out of the deli, as I walk down the street, I phone the hotel to let them know that I am checking out and that I would drop the key off later that afternoon. I had left nothing in the room, so they might as well get it ready for the next guest.

I stop just outside of the gate to the main yard of the house. It looks just as I remember it. Maybe a little older with a bit more wear but still the same. I let out the breath that I didn't realize I was holding. I had worried that it would have changed. That one of Edwards descendants would have changed something about the house but here it stood looking just as I remembered it. The windows were boarded up but that made sense if Edward Cullen lived in Forks.

I walked around to the back of the house. The oak tree was still in the same place that I remembered but now there was a small stone bench beneath it. I remember telling Edward that he should put one there as it was such a nice place to sit with a book and admire the scenery.

I move over to take a seat. There is an inscription etched into the stone.

_For the one who owns my heart, My own green eyed beauty, Where ever you may be. - 1918_

My breath ketches in my throat. This was _my_bench. The one that I told Edward he should put here and Edward put this here for me. A small sob escaped me and I could feel tears burning in my eyes and running down my cheeks. I let my fingers linger over the words as I knelt on the ground beside the stone bench. He had put this here. Immortalized his feelings for _me_into stone. He had wondered where I had gone. I wonder if he thought that I would one day come back here. Maybe he hoped that one day I would read this inscription and come back to him. Oh how I wish that I could.

Time has no meaning to me as I sit here letting my fingers brush over the words, over every letter. Every syllable being etched into my mind just as it is etched into the white marble stone in font of me. The inscription looked odd. If I did not know any better I would say that Edward wrote this in his own hand, for it looked remarkably like his penmanship. I tear my eyes away from the writing just long enough to look at my watch. It is now six-forty five. I have been sitting here for just over an hour and I will have to leave soon. If one stone bench can take my attention for that long I do not want to think about how much time I will spend in the cemetery.

I stand and decide to spend a few more minuets here at my bench. Taking a seat I look at the view around me, taking in all the differences and similarities between now and the last time I was here. The last time I sat in this spot Edward had been with me. I think that is the most noticable difference and the hardest to reconcile with.

It is now seven. I let out a sigh and rise to my feet. I would return here oneday, if only to see this bench again and to be lost in memories of a happier time. I make my way down the path that leads away from the house and to the Family Plot. The grownds have been remarcably well kept. I eases my heart to see that although Edward Cullen does not live here that he still cares very much for this place. I think that if he _had_let it fall into disrepair that I would have gotten Griffinger to claim the house for me. This place just means to much to me to do otherwise.

The Plot is small and really has not seemed to change much. This confuses me. It has been almost one hundred years since I was last here and yet there only seem to be two graves that are not in my memory. I walk towards them and when I am close enough, I read the inscriptions on the cold stone. These are Edwards parents. The date on his mothers stone tells me that she did not long survive after my departure. But Edward must have gotten better. Oh how again I wish I could have stayed.

I look around for his stone. I do not want to find it but at the same time I must. I have to know when he died.

It is not here. How could it not be here!? I know that he would not allow himself to be buried anywhere else and surely his children would not have disregarded his wishes. So were is his grave? I search over every stone but they are all ones that I have seen before. Where are the graves for his children? H-his w-wife? This does not make any sense. It is now eight-thirty and I have to leave if I am to make it in time to ketch my flight. But I still do not have any answers. Will I ever have any answers? This will just have to be another of the questions I ask Edward Cullen. I have to wonder how he will take my questions. Some of them are very personal and emotional, a distant relative would not have such a connection.

I pause briefly as I leave to brush my fingers once more over the words on the stone bench and then I hurry to leave. If I don't tear myself away now then I know that I wont leave and I need my answers to much to be delayed now. I will just have to come back later. I mean it is not like I do not have all the time in the world. I sigh as I leave the grounds. I will never be buried in that plot. Oh Edward how I miss you.

It takes me ten minuets to make my way back to the hotel, hand in my key, and hail a cab to take me to the airport. I barly notice the flight as my mind is constantly taken up with thoughts of the past, my dismal present, and the future. My future does not look very inviting to me. In fact it looks very long, lonely, and depressing. Right now I have a purpose; find Edward Cullen, find out what happened to _my_Edward, and then finish out muggle school. Very short term goals.

It takes only fifteen minuets from the time I land to find the rental booth and get my car. I made arraignments to simply purchase the car from them as I have no intentions of making it back to Port Angelus anytime soon. From there it was only an hours drive to my new house, I could not call it home. The Masen house had been home but even now I realize that it was only home because of Edward and his mother. I don't really remember much from the drive, just that I pulled up to a small desolate looking cabin. I knew from Griffingers report that the place was furbished and that the estate had someone come every once in a while to clean. That would change now that I was living here. I collapsed on the couch the moment that I arrived. I think that my watch said something about it being three-thirty three.

The sun is what woke me this morning. Wait no its not morning. Its about two in the afternoon. Well I had better get to work. I only have today to get this place cleaned up. I would have to go get food tomorrow, I still had some cake and other junk from one of my Weasley care packages. It would have to do for now regardless how much I would like to just through it in the trash. Well at least they were somewhat useful.

Its a modest little cabin. Nothing like what I thought my family would own. Nothing like what most pure bloods would own. There didn't seem to be a single room that has been expanded through magic. This made me smile. Although I have not given up my magical herritage I have no wish to live in a magical house. I just want to be normal for however long I will be allowed. Probably not very long if I know my luck. Besides it will only be a matter of time before I will be forced to move on anyway.

The main floor of the cabin is only a small sitting room with a fireplace, a must for any magical household, and a small kitchen separated only by a wall containing the staircase. If you stood at the front door looking in you look right up the stair and can see a small window at the top. If you turn left you would be in the kitchen and if you turned right you would be in the small sitting room. At the back of the sitting room on the wall with the stair their was a door leading to another stair which led down to the small basement. It was more like a cold root cellar than anything else.

Upstairs their were only two bed rooms and a very small bathroom that had a stand-up shower. There was no room for a tub. There was however a small open space at the top of the stair. It had another fireplace and two comfy looking chairs. Their were two doors on against walls that led to the two bedrooms with the bathroom situated in the master bedroom. Defiantly not a place to raise a family but comfortable enough to use as a hunting cabin with a few friends and defiantly comfortable enough to suit me. I had lived in a cupboard under the flipping stair for ten years. Living here, even if it was lonely to be by myself, would be a paradise compared.

However, this place is filthy. It would definatly take me the rest of the day even though I planed to use my magic and not muggle cleaning suplies. I proceeded to start with the kitchen and then moved to the master bedroom as well as the bathroom. These would be the rooms that I would need first. Once done I notice that I still have enough time to get atleast two more rooms done before supper. I would definately be finished before I go to sleep tonight. That made me smile. This place might not be home but it was mine and it would be in good condition be the time I am through with it.

I fell into bed completely exhausted. I did manage to get everything done though. I even managed to unpack my trunk. That is something that I haven't done completely in almost a year. What with the war going on, I never knew just when I would have to leave the place I was staying very quickly. So it was either be prepared to leave at a moments notice or loose everything. I choose to be prepared. I snicker as I think of some of the times Ron was caught with his pants down. Sometimes literally.

Morning came all to soon for me. This was it. My new start. It was also my opportunity to possibly meet Edward Cullen. Maybe I would get the chance to see him at lunch. That way I could introduce myself in a neutral setting and let him make the next move. Hmmm. Or maybe it would be more strategic if once I introduced myself to ask him to meet me here. Home feild advantage, that way if he tried anything.

I shake my head. When will I stop thinking about everyone as beening a possible enemy? Would that blasted war ever stop affecting me?

I get up and make my way out of the house and into my beat up little pick up. It is not really that old of a model but it looks like it has seen better days. I definitely paid too much for it but oh well, it will get me from point A to point B well enough. Its not like I will even notice the diference to my bank account.

The School is empty when I pull in. That could have something to do with the fact that it is seven and school does not start for another hour. I had made the split second decision to skip breakfast this morning. I just couldn't stay still and its not like not eating is going to kill me. I could only dream.

I parked in the teachers parking lot next to the office sign. I could move afterwards. That is better than parking in the student lot and then getting lost trying to find the office. This makes much more sense.

I open the office door, there is only a middle aged woman sitting at desk with a long counter in front of it. There was a sign that read Mrs Crope sitting on the counter.

"Mrs Crope?" She looked up startled. I guess not many students come into the office at this time of the morning.

"Yes dear. How can I help you?" She seemed sweet enough and nothing like those peppy secretaries that I have had to deal with in the past week. She did however give me a look over. That made me slightly uncomfortable.

"Hello. My name is Harry Masen. I believe that I Mr Lessinger was going to call and make arraignments for my attendance here."

Might as well be polite.

"My what a polite young man." See. Typical. "Yes. I have your information right here dear. This here is your class schedule." She handed me a white sheet of paper and then passed me another that looked to be a school map. "And this should help you find all of your classes. If you have any problems any teacher and most of the students will be happy to help. All you will need to do is ask." I give her a smile. "Oh and before I forget, here is a slip that you will need your teachers to sign. If you could bring it back at the end of the day, please?" She has me a pink slip with six boxes next to a number. I nod in answer to her request. "Well then, I think that is everything. You have a good day now, you hear?" I again nod and give her a smile as I leave the office.

I make my way back to my truck and over to the student parking. There are only a few cars in the lot as it is still early. I decide that I really don't want to sit around waiting and be gawked at. The rest of the students will be able to to that soon enough. I could spare myself that for at least another half hour by just going to my first class. With that in mind I look down at my schedule. My first class was English with Mr Masen. I let out a laugh. That was going to get old and frustrating very fast. It seemed that his class was in building B so I headed off in that direction according to my map. Really this school was not that big and Hogwarts is much more confusing. I would be just fine.

I make it to the class room but the door is locked. I will just have to wait in the hall. So much for my plan of not getting gawked at. Now the students might actually come up and try to talk to me. I shudder. I just wanted to be left alone. Maybe I would make friends with Edward Cullen and his family if things did not get to awkward but I have no intentions of forming lasting bonds with the general population of Forks High.

My scedual didn't seem to bad. I had English first, then Latin, followed by History - that would probably be my most difficult class as it wasn't my country's history and the fact that it would be muggle history on top of that. I then would have lunch followed by Biology, Math, and Gym. Fun.

The school is slowly starting to fill up and I have been getting a number of stairs. This was like first year all over again but instead of them talking about the Boy-who-lived it was about who the new kid was and why they hadn't heard anything before now. I knew that eventually someone would gain the courage to ask me the first question. I also knew that once that happened not only would that conversation be around the school in a matter of minuets but that it would open up the opportunity for others to try and make contact themselves. Unfortunatly this would be nothing new to me.

I could already see who would be the first to make that venture. She was a fairly prity girl with long brown hair and brown eyes. She had the look of someone who although at one time bookish and unpopular was now in the in-crowed and planned to stay there.

"Hi. My name is Bella. Bella Swan. Whats you name? Are you new?"

_Are you new?_What was with people and asking the most obvious stupid questions? I mean no. I have lived here my whole life, you just have never seen me before. I'm the home schooled hermit. Oh of course I was new.

Now be polite Harry. It is not your fault that she should have been born blond.

"Yeah, I'm new. My name is Harry Masen. I just moved here yesterday." I managed to keep the sneer from my voice.

"Oh wow. And you decided to come to school right away." She sounded incredulous. "Did you move here with your parents?"

"No. I live alone."

I am not liking this conversation.

"Oh. How come you decided to move here then?"

Yep. Really wasn't liking this conversation. Maybe I could steer it away from me and on to her. Girls like to talk right?

"I am here for meet a distant relative through marriage." That was true enough. "What about you? Have you always lived here?"

"Oh no. I moved here during last symester."

Score. I had an in. Now to just keep her talking about herself.

"Really? Why did you move here then?"

"Oh my family has always lived here. But when my mom and dad got divorced I went to live with my mom. When my mom got remarried I decided it was time to spend time with my dad. I moved out here so that my mom could travel with Phill, my step-dad. How old are you?"

Drat it was back to me. Well I only need to keep her ocupied for a few more minuets and then class should start.

"Seventeen. You?"

"Oh. I turned seventeen a few days ago."

"Really? Well happy birthday I guess."

Oh thank goodness. The teacher is here now I can stop talking. Knowing my luck she will gain a crush on me and then I will have another Ginny on my hands. That is the last thing that I want. I want to ask if she is seeing someone but if I do that then it would look like I'm interested and I'm not. I went and took a seat. The dratted girl followed my and took a seat beside me. She waved to another girl that just entered the room. That girl came and took the seat on the other side of me.

Drat.

I would have to be more careful where I sat from now on.

"Oh Harry. This is Jessica. Jessica this is Harry Masen."

"Oh like wow. You like have the same name as our teacher. Are you like related?"

How many times could someone use the word 'like' in one sentence.

"No. We are not related."

"Oh. Then who are you here to see? You said it was a relative?" Did Bella have to be so nosey?

"Yes. But we are related through marriage. We have actually never met before. I am here to meet an Edward Cullen."

Her jaw seemed to drop. Acctually both of their jaws seemed to be currently taking an interest in the floor.

"Edward Cullen?" Bella breathed. As if the name could only be spoken in the greatest of reverences.

"Oh like you are so like lucky." I turned to look at Jessica.

"Why?"

"Edward is like that most handsomest guy in school. Well like his brothers are just as hot but they are all like taken. They are dating their sisters." She said this last part in a stage whisper that I am sure most of the class heard. I could do with out her rumor mongering. Why is the teacher not stopping us from talking. And what is with the concept of a free day? "Bella here has a huge crush on the guy. But apparently none of the girls here are good enough for him. Like I care."

Sour Grapes.

"Well maybe he just doesn't like girls."

Oh boy. Why did I just say that? Was I trying to get on Edward Cullens bad side before I have even met the guy? I mean just because I am gay doesn't mean that other guys like being called that themselves.

"Oh maybe. I mean he does seem to like his music more that like anything else."

Okay it is official. This girl Jessica was stupid. Bella seemed to have a permanent blush due to the fact that Jessica was spilling her secret crush information to the new kid. Doesn't seem like a good friend material that one. Bella seemed to be trying to regain her ability to talk.

"So are you seeing anyone?" Great. See, I knew this would happen.

"No." Jessica seemed to perk up. "But I don't date." I watched her visibly deflate. Joy.

The bell rang.

"Well, you'll have to sit with us at lunch." I give a small shudder. I don't think that anyone noticed. Bella certinly didn't seem to. "What class do you have next?"

"Latin."

"Oh. I don't have that. I have Spanish."

Thank goodness.

"Do you need help finding your next class?" I watched as Jessica waved goodbye as she headed towards her next class.

"No. I can manage. Thank you." Damn me for being polite.

"Oh. Well see you at lunch." She waved and was gone.

Damn. I didn't get the chance to say that I didn't want to sit with them at lunch. But then again I would not be able to just flat out say that without being rude. Damn Edward and forcing me to use the manners that the Dursleys beat into me. But there was no way that I would let his memory down by being rude to a girl. Damn.

Latin was an easy class though. I think I gave the teacher a heart attack when I answered him back in perfect grammer. He was estatic. Thankfully I was left alone after that and because the teacher was strict none of the other students tried to talk to me. Although one student seemed to not be able to take her eyes off me. I hope that it doesn't lead to anything.

I mean she looked pretty enough with her short spiky hair. In fact she looked rather like a pixie but her skin was to white and pixie's can't hide their wings. I let my magic out to explore just a little. Yep definitely not human. Hmmm. Not sure what she is though. I will have to keep an eye on her. I wasn't to worried about the student population with an unknown creature wandering about. I mean it was obvious that she had been here awhile and no one was freaking out. But at the same time I didn't know how she would react to my kind. Not that I would be easy for her to kill. Next to impossible. But I don't want to move on from here just yet. I still have to meet Edward Cullen after all. I left the room before the Pixie had the chance to move to talk to me. There would be other times I'm sure but I would rather figure out what she is first.

History was boring but at least it was taught by a human and not by a ghost. I don't think that I could handle that level of boredom. The topics seemed interesting but could the teacher be anymore monotone? Finally it was lunch. I hope that I will get a chance to talk to Edward Cullen today. I am almost bouncing with energy as I make my way to the cafeteria. I hope that no one notices, I reinforce my oclcumency shields just in case and force myself to calm down.

As I take my place in line I scan the lunch room. There I go again looking for threats. But it seems as though I am not as paranoid as I think I am, for at the back of the room at a secluded table are five students that just by looking at them I know they cannot be human. Well four really. I cannot see the fifth very well. He is being blocked by the pixie that I share my Latin class with. They are all extremely beautiful but at the same time they give off a sense of danger. I know of only a few humanoid creatures that fit that description. None of them are very good. At the top of the list are Vampires but they would not be able to be around this many people day in and day out with out slipping and someone would have noticed their red eyes by now. That is not exactly normal.

The Pixy moves away to sit by the blond haired male and I almost fall to the floor. My legs have been turned to absolute jello. The boy, no man, she had been blocking looks exactly like my Edward. _My_Edward. Not some descendant but exactly the same. That should not be possible. I take shaky step forward and inhale a gasping breath. He turns and looks directly at me.

Gold.

He has gold eyes.

It all falls into place. I remember from my DADA class on vampires that their are a few very rare covens that refuse to drink from humans. Instead the call themselves 'vegetarians' and only drink from animals. I would have to be wary but there was not to much danger in being around them as long as no one in the school cut themselves. I would not have to worry. Because of my final spell against Voldemort my blood no longer calls out to vampires, or so I have been told.

Still.

Could he be Edward?

I take a seat at a nearby table, ignoring the students around me. I just could not take my eyes off of the boy sitting across the room. Bella and Jessica take a seat next to me but I still can't look away. All that I know is that the person that I am staring at is a vampire. I must know who he is. Without breaking my stare I ask Bella. "Who is _he?_" She seems to know instinctively who I mean.

"Oh that is Edward Cullen. Didn't you know? I mean you came here to see him, didn't you?"

I watched as the vampire heard this and raised one eyebrow in response. I could do nothing. With great difficulty I broke his stare and focused on the food in front of me. Of three things I was absolutely certain. One, that the person that I came here to meet is a vampire. Two, I have a very good idea who that vampire is. And three, I have absolutely no idea what to do now.

All that I can think, if you could call my chaotic thoughts thinking, were more questions. Why were they here? How were they here? How could they stand to be in a room with this many humans? Was it really possible? How could _he _be here? But the most pressing questions on my mind were; why was he changed? And Does he even still remember me? For the person on the other side of the lunch room could only be one person. The man that I have missed every day for the past year. My Husband.

Edward Masen.


	5. Blast From The Past

Sorry that this chp took so long but with marking essays I just didn't have time to write. This chp was so long and hard to write that I am thinking of shorter smaller chps that would mean faster updates. Tell me what you think. Also should Bella become more of a problem than just a minor nuisance? Just need to say a quick but huge thank you njferrell who in a review gave me many more ideas for scenes in this chapter. With out njferrell`s review this chapter would probably been half its length. So for the rest of you... See reviews do pay off. Please read and review.

_Once Upon A Love_

_Blast From The Past_

My hands flow gracefully across the black and white keys. Never faltering. Never missing a note. My hands know this song. It seems to be etched into there very sinew and bones. I wrote this song so long ago that if it were not for my enhanced memory I am sure that it would have been lost into the sands of time. I do not even need to think as I play this song. In fact my mind is notreally on the song at all, instead my mind seems to be a hundred miles away. Or a hundred years. No matter how long it has been I still cannot erase the few memories that haunt me.

It has been so long.

My family, with maybe the exception of Carlisle, do not understand why I torture myself in this manner. They don't understand why I do notlet my human life go and just move on. Lord knows that they have tired to 'help' me. Yet it is just no use. I cannot seem to get away from my memories. My most vivid one was the pain.

It hurt.

It was the worst pain that I have ever felt and probably would ever feel in my very long life. That is my most vivid memory but it is not the only one. The green eyes are the other.

His green eyes.

I do not remember much about my human life. I do not remember what my father looks like or what I did as a child. The few memories that I have managed to hold onto I have kept as my most precious of treasures. Even if they do bring me pain. The people that I remember the most are my Mother and _him._

My green eyed beauty.

_My Angel_.

I do not remember his name but I do remember him. He was mine. Or at least I thought he was. I wanted him to be and I thought that he wanted me just as much. I can still remember when my mother brought him home. How scared he seemed to be. Always insisting that he needed to return home but that he was not sure how. When asked he would say that he was lost, not sure how he had gotten to Chicago in the first place, but that he was from England. Mother offered him a place to stay and that was the moment that my life changed. I fell in love with him the first moment that I saw him, small and afraid, in our sitting room.

Oh of course it took me weeks to work up the courage to kiss him and tell him how I felt. I turned into a blabbering idiot. I remember that he just smiled, kissed me to get me to shut up, and told me that he felt the same. I think I didn't come down from my high for over a week but I cannot be sure. The memories fade. Though I do remember when I gave him the ring. I think that has to be my second most vivid memory. The day that I gave him the promise of forever.

Forever.

How strange that word seems now.

I think that if I could I would have given him forever. But I never got that chance. He always told me that he would have to leave eventually, that he would have to return home, that he couldn't stay. Yet, at the end, when I gave him my ring and asked him for forever, I thought that he would stay. I knew that it was a lot to ask, for him to give up his family, his friends, all that he had ever known just for me but I thought that he had made that decision.

But I guess I was wrong.

Maybe it was because I got sick and the doctors were not certain that I would live. Maybe he was misinformed and told that I was dead. Maybe, maybe, maybe. Maybe he just changed his mind. It is possible but I had still held out hope that he would return and that we could still be together, inspite of what I had become. But that hope didn't stay. As the years passed it got smaller.

I remember that he would come to the hospital with me everyday to visit my mother and then when I got sick as well he just seemed to move in and live in the chair beside my bed. No one could get him to go home, not even Carlisle, and he didn't seem to fear getting sick himself.

He was always there until one day he was not. He just disappeared. No one knew when he left or why, only that he was no longer there and I was alone. My mother didn't last more than a day after he left and Carlisle changed me two days after that. I can still remember it.

The Pain.

Pain.

Pain.

My whole body feels like its on fire! Why? I didn't think that dieing could be this painful! Harry? Harry!? Where are you? Tell them to stop the pain. Tell them to make it stop!

"Make it stop!"

"Hush. Hush. It wont be long now. Hush."

I felt a cool hand on my forehead. It quelled the pain somewhat but I still felt like my body was tearing itself apart. All I seem to be able to focus on is this pain and the face of my Angel. That and the cool hands help.

My heart feels like it is beating at a mile a minuet. I can hear it pound faster and faster in my ears and as its pace increases so does the pain.

"Hush. Hush. Its almost over."

That voice. Its not _his_. Its not my Angel's but is does sound familiar. Like I should be able to recognize it but I just can't think with all this pain. Where _is_ my Angel? My green-eyed beauty? What was his name? _Think_! But I can`t think and what does the voice mean by its almost over? Does that mean that I am going to die?

The pain is unbearable now and I can think of nothing else. My world has shrunk to nothing but the pain and a pair of startling green eyes.

All of a sudden the pain stops. It feels like the calm of the storm. When the winds and waves sense for just an instant before picking back up again. I lay here and wait for the pain to start again. It felt like it was my whole world for so long that it is almost unreal to live without it. But now that I can think again I realize that although the pain was all encompassing my Angel became my world long before the pain. Where is my Angel? Shouldn't he be here? I am struggling to remember his name but it just wont come to me. Amnesia? But I remember his eyes. I remember the sound of his voice and what he means to me. Why can't I remember his name?

"Edward. Edward, can you hear me?" _Why is it taking so long? He should be awake by now?_

What is taking so long? And who is that? And why do I feel like I should know him too? He is not my Angel but I feel like it is important that I remember him. That he is a piece of the puzzle that will make the rest of this mystery make sense. What happened? Why was i in pain to begin with?

Sick.

I was sick. Dieing. _He _was here. _My_ Angel. He wouldn't leave. Where is he now? Did I die?

"Easy Edward. Open your eyes. Your fine now son. Open your eyes." _Is he alright? Did something go wrong? Something could have gone wrong, this is the first time that I have turned anyone._

I am now officially confused. It is like hearing two voices at once that are exactly the same. annoying.

"Yes. I'm fine." I answer as I open my eyes. I take in the blond hair and white coat of a doctor. I still can't remember his name. My throat is starting to hurt too. Not anything like the previous pain but it is still annoying. Like a tickle that just can not be stopped or saited. "Who are you?"

"You must not remember me. I am your Doctor, CarlisleCullen." _Interesting. Human memories fade quite fast it seems._

"Human... What do you mean my memories fade? What is going on? Whats happened to me? Why does it feel like I have a soar throut?"

_Interesting. I never said anything about his memories but.._

"Yes you did! You said that human memories fade quite fast." What is going on here?!?

_I never said that out loud? Can he..._ "I think that you might be able to read my thoughts Edward. But lets take things one step at a time."

Thoughts! What? How? This really isn't making any sense. "What?"

"Just let me explain, Edward. But first let me ask what you do remember as it will make explaining things a little simpler."

Remember.

"I remember being sick. I remember My father dieing of it. Mother. She did too, I think." He nods here. I think that he is both confurmingand encouraging me to continue. "I remember, I can't seem to remember his name, but I remember him never leaving my side." It pains me to admit that I can't remember his name. He nods again.

"Yes. That's good Edward. That is a lotmore than most can remember about the time just before the change. By change I mean that you are no longer human." This makes me sit up and really look at him. I think that he has gone crazy but certain things stand out. The pain. The fact that there is very little light in this room and yet I can see him just as clearly as if we were in a well lit room or in broad daylight. "I know that this is hard to believe but it is true. You were dieing Edward and I promised your mother that I would do everything in my power to save you. I did so, but in doing so I turned you into something else. A Vampire Edward."

Vampire.

A Vampire. The live forever kind of Vampire? The human killing kind? What about my Angel? What would this do for us? Could we still make this work? Maybe.

"Does this mean that I kill humans now? What about my Angel? Where is he?"

_He does not know?_

"What do I not know?"

_Right. The mind reading thing._

"Mind reading?"

"Edward. I did not speak out loud just now. Sometimes when a human is turned they gain a special ability. It seems that yours is the ability to read minds. Let me show you. Focus on my lips and I will tell you what I know about the young man that was always in your room. Odd that no one knew his name but he rarely spoke unless to ask how you and your mother were." _No one has seen him since the day before your mother died, Edward. He was there one day and just was not there the next. We do not know what happened and did not have the extra man power to enlist a search. "_I am sorry, Edward."

I sit in silence for a long time. He was gone and I was a Vampire. He was gone and I would live forever. He told me that he would have to leave but I thought that he had chosen to stay. To be with me. But I had been dieing. Did that change things for him? Did he think that I had died and therefore left? Did someone find him? I know that he had someone after him in England, he told me that much. What happened? Wound he come back?

"I have to find him."

_Oh Edward. "_I am sorry Edward. But you will not be able to. That burning in your throat is telling you that you are thirsty. While you do not have to feed on human blood it will still call to you. You are what is called a newborn and you will have a hard time controlling your desire to feed on human blood. I find that animal blood will sustain us but it is notas filling as human blood. Or so I have been told. It will take you a few years before you will be able to be around humans again. I am sorry Edward."

I would not be able to be around humans? I could kill my Angel. Eat him? But I still had to find him. Had to know if he still wanted me even though I an no longer human. I really could give him forever now. Carlisle could help. Yet I can not go looking. Maybe he would come back. My Angel mentioned something that needed to be finished back where he came from, maybe he will come back once it is finished. But it sounded like I can not stay here to find him. If he can not find me will he leave again?

That thought sends shivers through me. The thought that he could come back and then leave thinking that I was dead or gone or... But what could I do to let him know that I was still waiting for him. It would have to be something special, something just for him. Something that he would know was just for him. Something like...

I smile knowing just what I would do. Or rather what I would ask Carlisle to do for me and it would involve humans. My Angel always did want a bench underneath our tree in the back garden.

"Carlisle. I can not and will not give up on my Angel. But I will notput him in harms way either. He mentioned that he needed to return home at some point in order to finish something. He will come back I know it and I want him to know that I am here waiting for him. Will you help me?"

_Yes._

Carlise helped me commission it. I ordered a mason to carve me an elaborate stone bench that would stand the tests of time. I also instructed him to leave the top smooth and to put no carvings on it. When it was done I placed it under the tree in the same direction as where he liked to sit and read. I then used my own finger to carve my message into the stone. I knew that he would recognize my writing. It might confuse him but it would also mean more to him. I decided to keep my message short.

_For the one who owns my heart, My own green eyed beauty, Where ever you may be. - 1918_

I hoped that he would find me. I even left a note in our room in a hidden place so that he would know to look in New York. If he came back looking, I wanted him to find me. I don't know what I would have done if he had found me. I was a vicious monster now but I still wanted him. I guess I was just a selfish vicious monster.

But he never came.

But at the time I still held out hope that he would be back. That he would return for me. I made Carlisle stay around Chicago for over ten years while I waited. That is what forced him to claim my inheritance for me. I needed a cover story.

But at the end of ten years I was not able to wait anymore. It wasn't fair to Carlisle to have him give up on the things that he loved doing just so that I could pine and wait for lost love. In the end we moved and Carlisle found Esme. I was happy for him. Really, I was. But it still hurt to see them together when I could not be with the one that I wanted.

Before we left Chicago I visited the house one last time. I walked the rooms like a ghost, hearing echos from the past. I could hear the piano play with his favorite song and I could hear my mother laugh at something silly that we had done in her presence. I could see us as we lay on my bed talking for hours. Little wifts of memory that were disjointed with each other. I do not remember what my mother was laughing about or what we talked about for hours. Those memories are like a thing just out of reach and no mater how much I strain to grasp them they still slip through my fingers.

I was walking under our tree when a powerful memory assaulted me. It was of us. Gawd, he was so beautiful. I might not be able to remember his name but I can still remember what he looked like, so frail and small yet strong with an inner fire that seemed to be unshakable. He had been hurt in his past, I remember that, but he still was so passionate and loving. In the time that he was with us he let his hair grow long. Not a fashion that was truly accepted but one thing that I loved about him was how he didn't seem to care. He could have every eye in a room focused on him and he would just carry on as though there was no one in the room but my family and I.

The memory was of the two of us beneath the old oak tree. The same tree under which I had proposed to him. Gave him my promise of forever. At the time it was as much as I could give him. My promise. We would not have been able to truly get married and I would never be able to give him my name but he could at least know that I had the intention. It seemed like it was enough for him then, now I am no longer sure.

This memory was after that, I think. I can remember that he was wearing my ring at any rate. He had been sitting at the base of the tree reading a book. Pride and Prejudice. If my memory serves me correctly it was his favorite. I had just returned from somewhere and had seen him in the garden as I made my way to the house. I had snuck up on him and covered his eyes. His laugh is something that I don't think I will ever forget. It sounded like bells. Now that I think about it, his laugh was very similar to how mine sounds now. Not that I laugh very much anymore.

He had shouted at me that I just couldn't go around scaring the life out of people. That it would come back to bite me one day. I just laughed at him and stole a kiss. That was always a sure fire way to get him to shut up and not be mad at me at the same time. I remember that he just seemed to melt into me and that I had to hold him up when his legs gave out. I also remember him mentioning that I really should put a bench out here for him.

"It would be the perfect place Edward. Just think about it. You know how much time I spend out here reading and think, the next time you come and kiss the life out of me I will have a place to ketch my breath! Besides it would be the perfect place to sit, just the two of us, and admire the scenery."

I never did get the chance to put a bench there before I got sick and he left. But as I stood there under our tree looking at the bench that I had put there I knew that I had made the right decision to put one there now. I might have to leave but _he_ still might come back. What would happen if he came back and I was no longer here? Would he think that I had moved on? Would he just leave again without trying to find me? I just couldn't bear the thought. So I did the only thing that I could in order for him to know that I still loved him. That I still wanted him. I gave him his bench but I also went a step further. I also left him the message. It was subtle because others might also read it but I managed it.

Carlisle had found Esme just before the I finally decided to stop being selfish and make him stay around Chicago. That was the reason that we moved to New York as soon as she could be around humans again. I sometimes wish that he hadn't found her but then I kick myself. He deserves every happiness that he can find. Apparently he thought the same about me. He, at the time, really didn't know much about my relation ship with my green eyes. My Angel.

I wish that I could remember his name.

But because he didn't know and he didn't know that I would never love anyone again, he changed Rosalie Hale. He wanted her to be for me what Esme is for him. She was furious when I refused to even look twice at her. It took a confrontation when Carlisle and Esme were out hunting for her to understand and for us to grow close as siblings.

"Why?"

I looked at her in surprise as she stormed up to me at the piano. "Why what?"

"Why do you ignore me? What have I ever done to you? Carlisle said that he changed me for you but you wont even give me the time of day? Am I not prettyenough for you? Or is it because I'm used?"

Gawd, I don't want her to think that. She has had enough happen to her without her thinking that I don't want her because she was raped. That was not her fault.

"No, Rose. That has nothing to do with it. You are very pretty and I am sure that if things were different that I might fall for you. But there are things about me that you don't know. I don't think that Carlisle even truly knows everything. but I can tell you right now that you are not _used_. You will find someone for you someday and they will love you more than life itself, but it wont be me."

"Why?" She seemed kind of small when she said this. It was the first time I had ever seen Rosalie looking vulnerable.

"Because someone else already has my heart and I cannot give it to another."

She seemed shocked by this revelation. "Who is it? And why aren't they here with you know if you love them?" She seemed to want to take her words back when she saw the effect that they had on me.

"I don't know where he is Rose."

"Wait _he_?"

"Yeah." I let out a deep sigh.

"Tell me everything. It will help you feel better Edward. Maybe I can help."

I took a deep breath and told her everything. About how he came to me and how he left and that I was changed and could not find hide nor hair of him anywhere. About how I missed him and that no one would ever be able to replace him. No matter if I knew he was no longer on this earth. I told her about my hopes to find him and change him and spend the rest of eternity with him but also my fears that he had moved on and that if I ever did find him that he would no longer want me. I told her everything.

"I have never told anyone all of that Rose."

"Don't worry brother, it will be our secret. We will be single together. I promise I will help you find your green eyes."

And she did. She helped me search privately and secretly for five years. Until she found Emmett. I remember how happy she was when he woke and called her an angel. It made me miss _my_ Angel even more. After that she spent her time helping Emmett adjust to his new life and of course two years later they were married. I envied her. She still helped me look but she had other obligations now and I didn't hold it against her. I wanted her to be happy but it still hurt to see the rest of the family with their loved one when I could not have mine.

It was ten years after her marriage that I realised that my efforts were futile. It had now been over thirty years. My love would be an old man by now with children of his own. Even if I did find him there would be no way for us to be together. I sunk into a depression and started to question everything that I had come to believe. Including Carlisle's vegetarian ideals. It was then that I went on my rebellious streak. I left the family and started to hunt humans.

I stayed away from any small green eyed, dark haired men but I used my ability to read minds to hunt down the criminals. I rationalized it to myself by saying that I was making the world better and that they would no longer be able to hurt any other innocents. I had thought of my green eyes then. I knew that someone had hurt him and for awhile this seemed like a way to make it up to him, to protect him and others like him. When I finally snapped out of my depression I realized that I could never have been more wrong. There was nothing right about what I was doing.

It was actually a small black haired boy that made me snap out of it. I had been tracking a mugger back to his place and when I made my move to attack the boy was there, screaming for me to let go of his father. It was then that I realized that no matter what I did, even if I did hunt the guilty, that I was still hurting the innocent. That little boy reminded me of my green eyes. That boy was not scared of me only scared for his father. The boy had a look of determination in his eyes as he tried to attack me to get me to let his father go.

In the end, I dropped the unconscious father and ran. I had not yet bitten him when the child stopped me so all I did was run. I realized then that my green eyes would never have wanted me to do what I did. My Angel would never have wanted me to become the monster that I had become of the the past few years. I ran back to Carlisle. He said that he was waiting for me and that he knew that I would return.

It wasn't until I returned home that I realized that I spent ten years killing. I vowed to never touch human blood again.

It was not long after I returned that we moved to Forks for the first time and Alice and Jasper found us. I still hold a small grudge against that little Pixie for stealing my room.

It is still hard being around my family. They all have someone. Someone to make this life worth living. I have given up long ago that my love will come back to me. With the amount of time that has past it is really an impossibility. My fingers move to start the song again when I hear Alice gasp. We all turn to face her.

"What did you see?" Jasper asks his wife with concern. I also turn to listen as my mind was elsewhere and I did not share this vision with her.

"Someone is looking for us."

We all tense.

"What do you mean?" Carlisle asks as he joins us in the living room.

"I saw a office with a boy asking for an Edward Cullen. I then saw him here in Forks attending High School with us. He was looking for you Edward but I don't know why. The vision was very fuzzyand I really couldn't see the boy to well. Only that he had long black hair and green eyes."

My heart would have stopped at her description if it had been beating, instead I settled for just not breathing. The picture of the boy in her mind looked just like my green eyes. My Angel. Only that was impossible. He would be ancient if he was still alive and this boy looked like he was about the same age as my Green eyed Angel was when he disappeared. A descendant perhaps? But why would he be looking for me? And if it was a descendant would I want to meet him and know for sure that my love had moved on and eventually died or would it be better to live without knowing for certain?

Alice's eyes glazed over and we all looked at her.

"The man from the office is going to be calling in a minuet."

"Are you sure love" Jasper asked. "Do you think that he means us harm?"

"I don't know Jazz. I can't really get a good picture of the boy. I think that he means us no harm but we will just have to wait and see."

The phone rang and Carlisle answered it. We listened to the conversation with interest. What could that boy want? Especially with me?!

_"Hello, Carlise Cullen? This is Mr Lessinger from Lessinger and sons. I head the Masenestate here in Chicago, I was hoping to talk to Edward Cullen if he was available?"_

Wait that was the man that was in charge of my family estate and home. What could that boy want with the Masen estate?

"The Masenestate? Why is anything wrong?"

_"No, no. Nothing is that matter. I just have a young gentleman here, a Mr Masen, who is looking for some information into the Masenfamily."_

Information. Why would someone be looking into my family now? This was something that I expected 50 or more years ago but not now. Now there was no one left that had any connection to me. But that boy. He looked just like my green eyes. My Angel. But there is no way that he could be. My Angel is gone.

"Well if he is trying to take Edwards inheritance from him he will have a hard time. Edward has full right to it."

I really didn't care about the monetary inheritance but the house, the house was something that I would never give up. It was the only place that I could go and loose myself in memories of him. I would never give that up and this little brat had another thing coming if he thought that he could take it from me. Whether he looked like my Angel or not.

_"Yes, that's right. I told him that myself and he clams to notwant it. I really should be speaking to Edward is he available?"_

Okay. So if it is not the estate that he is after then what is it he wants? I almost wish that I was in that office so that I could just hear the little brats thoughts and get this over with. Now I guess I have to do this the hard way. The normal way. I don't think I like this very much. I nod to Carlisle to tell him that I will talk to the lawyer.

"Yes. He's here. Just let me go and get him, we just got back from a weekend camping trip."

Camping. Right. Hunting is more like it. It was sunny anyway, not like we could have gone to school even if we had wanted to.

_"Yes I'll wait."_

I have to wait a few minuets before I can take the phone. It would look suspisious otherwise.

"Hello. Mr Lessinger? How can I help you?"

_"Ah Edward. How are you?"_

"I am fine Mr Lessinger. I hope you are doing well, also?"

_"Good, Good. Well as your father might have told you I have a young gentleman here who is claiming to be a relative of yours."_

He is claiming to be a relative. Now that it is confirmed I don't know whether to be angry or just annoyed. I did not have any family left. And Alice saw that this boy looks just like my Angel so he couldn't be related to me, he would have to have been related to _him_. So then why say he is related to _me_?

"Well even if he is, there is no way that he can contest the line of inheritance. My family has inherited it directly for the last 100 years or so. So if he know that then what is it he is after?"

_"No. He claimsto only be after information."_

Information. What kind of information could he want. I wonder yet again. I refuse to let myself have any sense of false hope. This was not my Green eyed Angel. He was dead or if not, to old for me to ever go near again. He had chosen to leave and there was nothing that I could do about it. Now, I had to figure out what to do with his look-a-like.

"What kind of information is he looking for?"

_"Looking into his family tree it seems."_

Family Tree? Impossible. Now what to do. He probably wont give up if I just say no and if he continues to dig, the brat might find out that the same Edward has been inheriting the same estate for the past 80 or so years and that just could not happen. So what now? If I said no, bad things could happen as consequence, but if I said yes... Then I would have to meet a man whose looks haunt my thoughts enough as it is. Do I really want that constant and very visual reminder of the things that I have lost. Things that I will never get back.

Not really. But what choice do I really have?

"Do you think that he is telling the truth?"

_"Yes he seems trustworthy to me. Claims to already have his own fortune and was quite upset that I gave the impression that he was out to steal yours."_

Fantastic. A rich Brat.

But still, I wanted answers and the only way that I would be able to get them is if I met with this _Masen._

"Fine. I will meet with him and discover for myself if he is truthful or not. Let him know that he will have to come to me. I have no time to go running after every supposed relative that wants to meet with me. My mother would be very displeased if I were to miss school."

Okay, so maybe I am being just a little rude but really who could blame me. This unknown person has shown up and with him come memoried and feelings that have haunted me for 80 years.

_"Yes I will tell him. Where are you located now? I know that your father likes to move around a lot."_

"Yes. Father likes to work in places that would benefit from his help. We are currently in a small town called Forks in Washington."

Let the little brat come to me.

_"Alright, got it. Thank you Edward. I must say that given what I have seen so far I would expect for you to see him within the week, two at the very most."_

Why would he drop everything and come to find me? I thought that he would wait until things were convenient for him. It is not easy to just pick up and move.

"Well I shall look forward to his arrival. I hope that you will have a pleasantevening."

_"Yes, yes. Well good day to you, Edward."_

I hung up the phone and turned to my family. Most were sitting with varying degrees of confusion. Only Carlisle and Rosalie really had any idea why this was affecting me as much as it was. Just who did this guy think he was. Why was he showing up now to disrupt my life. Could he not just leave me in peace. I may not be able to find the happiness that my family has found in their mates but I have found relative peace and now even that is suddenly not enough as memories of my Angel are brought to the surface constantly. Hauntingly.

"What is going on Edward?" Alice asks. She really doesn't like being left in the dark. I think that it makes her feel insecure and edgy.

_Yes brother, why do you feel as if the world was ending. Your emotions are running so fast it is hard to tell them apart._

"I don't know how to explain everything to you. The only ones who really who really know anything are Carlisleand Rose." Everyone looks to them but they give nothing away. This is for me to tell and now I have to tell them something. It is now time for them to know about my past. Emmett better not make any jokes. I don't think that I would take that very well.

"Carlisle knows that when I woke that I was obsessed with finding the boy that would not leave my bedside while I was sick but only Rose really knows why. Carlisle, you remember when you changed Rose how I would noteven give her a second glance?"

He nods. They are all suddenly paying even more attention. I have never told anyone but Rose the reason why I did not want her. Esme is only hoping that I will be able to find someone who will complete me, she doesn't care who just as long as I am finally happy. I almost do not have the heart to tell the that what she wants will never happen.

"Well the reason for that is because I had already found my mate when I was human. I know that this sounds impossible but it is true. Another reason that I would notconsider taking Rose for a mate was because she was a girl."

I let this sink in and Emmett sucked in an unnecessarybreath. "So you like guys?" I nodd "Well man, I always knew there was a reason that you wouldn't look twice at Rose, let alone Tanya, I guess I gotta thank this mate of yours for giving me my Rosie." He said this as he pulled Rose into his lap with his arms around her middle. "But why are you telling us this now?"

"The boy that is in Alice's vision is looking for me. We all knew that but what I didn't tell you is that he looks exactly like my mate. The only problem with that is that my mate was human. My mate lived 80 years ago and the boy in her vision is also human. There is no way that they are the same person but the fact that they look alike, hauntinglyalike, tells me that he must be related which means that my mate moved on."

I didn't need to say anything more. They all understood the pain that I was going through with that revelation. Suddenly Alice went stiff in Jasper's arms and I was surrounded by her vision. It was of the boy again. But now that I really look at him I realize that he really is not a boy at all. He must be around 17. He looks like a slightly older version of my Angel. My Angel who was 16 the last time I saw him. It was like taking a step back into the past and My Angel was walking in the front gate of our home in Chicago. But it wasn't my Angel and I have to keep reminding myself that as I watch him walk around the back of the house. It is not a random, curious about history walk, but a purposeful one. He knew where he was going. This look-a-like knew what he wanted to see. As if he had been here before and was making sure that what he remembered was still where he left it.

It doesn't make sense.

Then the boy found the bench. My Angel's bench. I watched as the mans breath seemed to ketch and tears filled his eyes. Why would he react like that? It was the reaction that I always thought my Angel would have on first seeing his bench but why would this _descendant _react like this? I watch as he lets his fingers brush against the inscription almost reverently. He doesn't sit on the bench, like most would, but on the ground his eyes focused on the words.

This doesn't make sense!

The vision shifts to the same man walking amongst the graves of my family plot. I have made sure that nothing has changed at my family estate. It is the place where I can go to remember the past and to remember _him_. But this stranger walks through the graves like he has been there before and he stops in front of my mothers grave and brushes the date of her death. His eyes are remorseful, like he knew her and was sorry that she had died. Then he looks to where my grave should have been had I been human. He seems surprised to not find it and then his eyes turn panicked. He searches every stone and I can't help feeling that he is looking for me. But why? Why is it so important that he find my stone?

He seems to deflate and looks to the time. He seems defeated to the fact that he can't stay. But why is he in a hurry? He is not leaving Chicago already, is he? He only found my address today! I watch as he stops once more to let his fingers brush my inscription. It seems to have more meaning to him than it should to a stranger. It also seems like he has to tear himself away from the bench. Like he wants to stay but know that he has to leave.

No Sense at all.

The vision shifts again to the same man boarding a plane bond for Port Angelus. By the calender on the ticket desk and the clock on the wall I am able to tell that it is tonight. He did all this in just a few hours. This man will be here tomorrow morning. This is all happening to fast. I expected to have more time to deal with the emotions that this look-a-like brought with him before actually having to deal with him.

"Well?!" Emmett's voice cut through my thoughts. "What is it? What did you see Alice?"

"He's coming. The boy is coming here tonight." Jasper seemed to freeze around his wife. His thoughts filled with scenarios of how to deal with this situation. Always the soldier.

"Well I guess the only thing we can do is wait." We all look to Emmett. "What? Its not like we can do anything right now! And what is the human going to do? He will have to have someplace to stay and then get a hold of Edward so we still have a bit of time. Notlike he will come here strait from the plain."

Right. Why did he have to be the smart one right now.

_Edward, are you alright?_

"I'm fine Rose. Alice, when will we be meeting him?"

A moment. Then a scene from the school parking lot. Its blurry but I can see the boy as he walks into the building, his eyes never leaving my face.

"Two days. In the parking lot at school." Alice lets everyone else know as she leans back into Jasper's embrace.

"Well at least it will be public." Jasper huffs.

It is going to be a long wait. At least we will have school tomorrow for me to waste time on.

"Its going to be sunny tomorrow as well."

Darn. There goes my distraction.

I spend Tuesday lost in my memories and thinking about the strange look-a-like and my Angel. It is not possible for them to be one and the same. Yet I find myself hoping even though I know that there is nothing that can come from it. My Angel is lost to me and I will not take a substitute. No matter how much this look-a-like looks like my Angel, there is no way that he is and therefore I want him out of my life as soon as possible.

Wednesday dawns with no further revelation about this brat that has disturbed my solitude. As we get ready to leave I have to remind myself that I cannot take my frustrations out on this stranger. That would not be fair to him and at the same time it would lead to unwanted questions. But why did he have to use the name _Masen_. The thought stopped me. If this man was my Angel's descendant why is he using my name? My Angel never took my name. It was impossible at the time and if my Angel took my name as a reminder of me then why did he never return? It seems that I have more to ask this stranger than I originally thought. I am now looking forward to the mutual interrogation. I will just have to be careful that I do not give to much information away. For how would _I_ a _descendant_ of myself know very detailed information.

"Oh"

"Alice?" What happened now? I really should have been paying attention.

"He changed his mind!" She always hates it when people do that at the last minuet and it messes with her plans. "We wont see him now until lunch. He decided to leave for school early. Even if we left now we would not get there in time. And something is interfearingwith my vision for lunch. There must be too many decisions left to be made once he sees us."

Great. Even more waiting now.

The morning seemed to pass with uncommon slowness. Only listening to my sister's Latin class and My brother's history class gave me any repreve from the monotony that turned out to be my morning. I could not focus on anything but thoughts of this new boy. Although it didn't seem right to call him that, he was more man than boy. From watching him through my siblings I was able to pick up even more similarities to my Angel. I think this frustrates me even more. Why is the stranger tormenting me so. The possibility that he is my Angel are very slim. If he was a vampire then I would be able to entertain the thought that the only reason that I have been without my Angel for the past 80 years is that he was staying away for the same reason that I could not look for him and that now he thought me dead. But this person was human so that ruled out my only hope.

Yet he looks so much like my Angel. He even has the same scar on his forehead.

I walk into the cafeteria and take my usual seat at our table. "Have you seen the new boy. He is even cuter in person than he was in my vision. He is over in line right now and will sit with Bella and Jessica. I get the feeling that he would rather be anywhere else but with them but is too polite to say anything."

Even that sounds like something my Angel would do. Alice moves to sit beside Jasper and I am suddenly distracted by a sharp intake of breath. Looking around my eyes lock onto a pair of startling emerald eyes. Eyes that I have not seen for 80 years. What startles me is the recognistion, disbelief and flat out hope that I see reflected in those eyes. Yet at the same time that I see confusion I also see understanding and that is confusing and frightening to me as I don't know what this new comer is thinking. It is like Bella all over again. I cannot seem to read his thoughts but his eyes. I can read those just like I used to be able to read my Angels.

What is going on?

The new boy seems to be in a state of shock. Like he was not expecting to see me and can't get over the fact that he is in the same room as me. It is an expression that one might find on a person who see someone they thought was dead, whom they had morned for, and yet was sitting across the room from them. Which did not make sense to me because this Masen could not have known me. Unless he really was my Angel and he thought me dead. Yet how could that be possible. Do I really let myself hope after all of these years?

_His emotions are chaotic Edward. There is so much hope and love flowing through him that it is a little overwhelming yet there is also fear. Yet not the kind that you expect from a human in the company of Vampires. It is more like a fear of rejection or a fear of the unknown._

Love, hope, and a fear of rejection? Emotions that I would expect from my Angel if he had ever come back. Emotions that I know I would feel if I thought that I would be in my Angel's presence about to explain to him what I have become. Emotions that I have already begun to feel even though I try to stop myself from feeling them. It is insane to think that this Harry Masen, I glean the name from the students around him, was the same person that I fell in love with 80 years ago. But if he was then I think we would have a lot to explain to one another. Starting with why he left and how he was still alive.

Why am I even considering this possibility? It is insane.

_"_Who is _he?" _Harry Masen asks that annoying Bella Swan next to him. I thought that he had come to meet me? Should he not already know what I look like and who I am? And what is with his tone? It is like he is looking for confirmation about something. This is impossible. Yet he still hasn't broken his gaze away from mind. It is almost like he thinks that I might disappear if he turns his gaze away. Angel? I give my head a minute shake, not that any human would be able to notice. This is not possible. My siblings are worried for me and for vampire ears only I quickly tell them that I'll be fine.

"Oh that is Edward Cullen. Didn't you know? I mean you came here to see him, didn't you?"

I hear this and raise and eyebrow at him. He doesn't seem surprised that I could hear him from this distance and that is slightly worrying. So he was looking for confirmation but at the same time it was not the kind that I would have expected. He knew me. He knew me and was not expecting me to be here. Was it possible that this really was my Angel and he really did think that I was dead? Could something have happened that made all this possible? But what and why now? Lunch is almost over and I find myself hoping in ways that I have not been able to in a long time. If this really was my Angel then it was possible that he was tracking _Edward Cullen _down in order to find out what has happened to _me_. But I know that my Angel's last name was not Masen the last time I had seen him. Could he have taken my name after what ever happened to make him leave? And this Harry Masen looks like he is no more than a year older than my Angel was the last time I had seen him. I have more questions than I have answers but how will I be able to get those answers without revealing my secret. Yet the possiblility is also there that this Harry Masen already knows what I am and that leaves even more questions.

"No. I have never seen a picture of Edward Cullen before. I came here because he is the last living descendant of the Masen line dating back to an Edward Masen in 1918. We are not related by blood but through marriage, also dating back to that same Edward in 1918."

He looked at me when he said this and I swear he was looking for some form of acknowledgement or recognition from me. His eyes spoke of a desperate hope that I would do something. Say something. Show that I remembered him. My hope that he really was my Angel soared just a little higher. But what was this about marriage. I never got to marry my Angel and yet here my maybe Angel is telling me that I did?! He said all this information like it was meant for me and not the gossipy girls he was talking to. He knew I would hear and it seemed like he was testing the waters. Giving me information and hoping in return that I would acknowledge him.

_Edward, he is telling the truth. He is filled with nothing but hope and desperation. It feels like he was breaking and in so much pain when he first entered but since he has seen you all he has been feeling is longing, hope, and desperate desire. I think that this desperation is from a desire to believe that you are real. I think that it is possible that this really is your mate._

I want desperately to believe Jasper and I think that in the end I already do but there are still many things that are stopping my from crossing the lunch room and taking my Angel in my arms. Yet if he really is my Angel then I will not leave him feeling rejected and hurt, I would not be able to live with myself if I did that and it turned out that My Angel really is Harry Masen. I keep eye contact as I give him a smile that I only ever gave to my Angel. His eyes fill with a relief and longing that send shudders through me as he responds with his own shy half smile that is purely my Angel.

I still have more questions than answers but now I am sure that this really is my Angel and nothing else matters than that. I know that we will have a lot to work through not the least being why he left, how he is here now, and my own non human status but that doesn't matter right now. Nothing matters but the fact that my Angel is back and soon I will have him in my arms again. The answers wont change the fact that as long as he still wants me I will never leave him again. His using of my name tells me that he does still want me though I think one of my first questions will be why he is telling me that we are married and how that is possible. But first I will have to get through the rest of the school day, find someway to introduce myself so that I can reasonably talk to him in front of the students, and then find some secluded place where we can talk and answer the questions that I know both of us have. You would think that after all this time as a vampire that I would be used to waiting but in reality, I hate it.

I say goodbye to my family and Alice sends me a knowing look all the while translating the American national anthem into Japanese. Annoying little pixie. As I pass by the table that my Angel is sitting at I give him another smile and listen as the annoying girls grill him about me as I pass. The answering smile and love filled look have me walking on clouds all the way to my next class.

Biology.


	6. Not Alone Anymore

Reviews, reviews, reviews. They really do make the world go round. Especially the ones that ask questions or make comments about the story and where it is heading. Those reviews get me thinking and of course once I start thinking then I want to start writing, and once I start writing that means a new chp for all of you. Therefore it is incumbent upon you to read and review! I would like to know if you want to see this chp from Edwards POV or if you would like me to go straight into the next chp. Also, for major scenes, like this one, do you want me to follow up with an Edward POV right away or later like I did in chp 5? Let me know. Now on with my story. I am so excited!*hehe* ^.~

_Once Upon A Love_

_Not Alone Anymore_

"No. I have never seen a picture of Edward Cullen before. I came here because he is the last living descendant of the Masen line dating back to an Edward Masen in 1918. We are not related by blood but through marriage, also dating back to that same Edward in 1918."

My eyes do not leave Edwards. I want so desperately for him to understand. For him to show some form of recognition. That he remembers me and our love. I know that it is far fetched. Not only do most vampires loose their human memories but I am also in the wrong time. Edward would have to suspend disbelief in order to believe that I am who I am implying. I should not let myself hope and I long for him to remember and take me into his arms and never let go. He is alive and that is all that truly matters. yet even as I tell myself that I know that if he doesn't remember me, or if he rejects me then I will truly have nothing left to live for. If that happens then I just might take my own life. If I can figure out how to accomplish that.

He smiles. My smile. The smile that Edward only ever gave to me. I would know, I spent weeks watching him when I was in the past. This smile has always left me feeling breathless and week kneed. Edward always thought that it was funny. I return my usual shy half smile. He knows. He remembers. Now what? Lunch is almost over and with these girls everyone will know that we have never met. I want to be in his arms now!

He passes by my table on the way out of the cafeteria. Darn, lunch is over and I have no time to corner him so we can talk. My frustration must be evident because he gives me another smile before leaving.

"Wow! Edward Cullen smiled at me!"

Say what? Bella really is delusional.

"He did. Did you see the way that he was looking at you to Harry. It was kinda weird though. It was like he knew you. Though it is really interesting how your families go way back like that. Oh what class do you have next? Maybe we have it together!"

Oh please let us not share the same class. Please, please, please!

"I have Biology in A3."

"Oh I have the same. I am lab partners with Edward but he rarely says anything to me. Maybe he is too shy. I am sure that he likes me but just doesn't want to say anything. Well we better get going lunch is over and Mr Braner hates it when we're late."

Why oh why could she not stop talking? I am going to have serious words with Edward about this whole mess. Starting with teasing him about his stalker and ending with telling him off about drilling manners into me. I really want to tell this chit to bug off.

As we enter Bella bounces off to take her seat beside _My_Edward. Hmm, this just wont due. I have waited to long to let some bimbo try to make a move on my Husband and I really don't think that I could wait any longer to be able to speak with him. A mild compulsion on the teacher should do the trick.

"Oh, Mr Masen. So glad that you came to join us. We will have a full class again now that you are here. Hmm, where to put you. Ah I know! Bella could you please take the empty desk next to Tyler and Harry you can take the seat next to Edward."

Yes! Success!

No one seems to think that it is strange to make Bella move to the empty desk except for Edward who raises an eyebrow at me. I just shrug while trying to look innocent. He is definitely not buying it as he sends a smirk my way as I take the now empty seat.

"Now class we will be having these seating arraingments for the rest of the turm. So say hello to your now perminant lab partner."

Okay, so I didn't want him changing his mind later and moving me. Bella shoots me a dirty look. Like it was my fault that the teacher moved her. Well she doesn't know that so really she should not be blaming me. I hear Edward chuckle softly next to me. The sound is like water to a dieing man. How I have missed him. I know that we have much to talk about and I have much to explain but right now I am just going to enjoy being near him and for once not worry about the future. I have my Husband back and that is all that matters.

"Angel." He breaths. He still calls me that? After all this time. It sends shivers down my spine.

"Edward." I breath in return. " I have missed you so much."

"As I have missed you, Angel. I almost cannot believe that you are sitting right here beside me. If it were not for the fact that I can't sleep I would think that you were a dream." He stiffens as he mentions his vampirism. It must bother him but I don't care what he is as long as he is alive and if becoming a vampire enabled him to be with me now then I would not say one negative thing on the subject. I just hope that he accepts me when all is said and done.

"Silly boy. I'd kiss you right now if I thought I could get away with not making a scene. Relax. I am not going anywhere. Not again. Not anymore." This seems to make him relax as his grip on the table loosens.

"Why did you leave?"

"I didn't have a choice. They never gave me a choice and by the time that I could do anything about it, it was to late to go back. I thought you were dead." I keep my voice to a frantic whisper. I want desperately for him to believe me. To believe that I never had a choice in leaving him.

"Who forced you! What happened?!" Edward's voice raised slightly in furry. Would he still be mad at the others after he told the truth or would Edward's anger be focused on me instead? But really this wasn't the place to have this conversation. We could be overheard and we have to many secrets to share for that to happen.

"Mr Cullen! Is there something you and Mr Masen would like to share with the class? I will tell you now that if you continue to disrupt the class by not getting your work done, I will move you apart."

"Sorry Sir. It will not happen again." Smooth Edward, smooth.

'We'll talk later. Now is not the time or place Edward.' I scribble a note and pass it to him.

'I know. I have just missed you and feel frustrated that I have to wait.' Edward never was vary patient when he wanted things to happen.

'We will have to wait until after class at least.'

'Your willing to miss class? You never let me do that before.' True I had refused in the past to let Edward skip school to be with me but really, we haven't been together in so long that I was not going to wait if I didn't have to. Besides, Edward had probably been though high school at least once before anyway.

'True, but this is different. Do you know where we could go to be alone and talk?' I refused to let my mind think about what could happen after I told him my side of the story. I know I will not take his rejection well.

'Yeah I know a place. We can go after this class but for right now we better get to work. Mr Baner is starting to get annoyed with us.'

With that our conversation ended and I found that I had to focus on the material. This class was going to be harder than I thought. Why did I think that I could skip 6 years of Muggle schooling and still do the work? On top of that the material that Edward taught me in the past did not really measure up to the tests of time. If Edward is still talking to me by the end of today I am going to have to ask him for some serious help.

Class ended without anymore interference from the teacher but I know that we are going to have to be more careful. My spell could still be broken and would really take a few more days to become permanent. If we made to much of a disturbance the teacher could start thinking that he had made a mistake in the seating arrangement. Yet if we did nothing to draw attention and the spell set into place then the teacher would dismiss any disruption by thinking to himself that we at least go our work done.

I follow Edward out into the parking lot and we get into my truck. "What about your car Edward?"

"Don't worry about it. Alice knows that we're leaving and I left the keys in the car for her. Nobody would think of touching it, believe me."

How did Alice already know that we are leaving? She was no where near when we made that decision and because we were writing it down there is no way that she could have overheard it. Even vampire hearing cannot hear a written note!

"Okay. Do you want to drive since you know where we're going?"

"Yeah. You don't mind do you? I like to go pretty fast."

"I don't mind fast. If the truck can't take it, I will simply have to get a new one."

We got into the car and took off. I could see what Edward meant by liking to go fast.

"Don't you worry about getting pulled over?"

Edward looks slightly uncomfortable. Could this have something to do with his vampirism?

"No. But could I explain that later?"

I nod. I guess that I am right about it being a vampire thing. I try to remember everything that I know about them. I remember reading that Vampires sometime came through the transformation with a power. A representation of their strongest trait. I wonder if that was the case with Edward. If so, what was his power?

"So, if you can replace this old truck if I wreck it, why do you have it?" It seems that Edward does not like the silence after my last question.

"Well, I only bought this one because I didn't want to have to go back to Port Angelus to return it as a rental. That and I really didn't want to stand out." He grins at me. He knows as well as I do that I hate being the center of attention to a group of strangers. Family is different. Edward is different. I like it when I get attention from Edward but strangers? No thank you.

We stop by the side of the road that has a path beside it. Somehow I don't think that this is were Edward is taking me. He seems nervous as he makes his way around the truck to where I am standing.

"I know that I will have a lot to explain Angel, but I need to know, do you trust me still?"

What kind of question is that?

Okay so it is a logical question with the amount of time that we have spent apart. But still it hurts that he thinks that I would no longer trust him. Is he really that worried about being a vampire and my reaction? Doesn't he know that I already know? It should be me that is freaking out right now. I am the one that has to explain why I left, why I could not come back, not to mention the fact that I am a freaking WIZARD! But no, it is Edward that is all nervous and I think that is what is calming me down the most. He is so worried that I wont accept him and that must mean that he still wants me, therefore he should, I repeat should, still want me when he finds out the truth about me too. Right?!

"Of course I still trust you. I will never stop trusting you." He takes a deep unnecessary breath.

"Climb on my back then. It will be much faster than if we walked."

Oh, Vampire speed then. He seems confused when I don't ask for an explanation and simply climb onto his back. He takes a second and I just enjoy being so close to him. And then were off. Edward is much faster than my firebolt. I love this! We are so going to have to do this again once we are finished talking. I think that if he wants, Edward can run me anywhere he wants. Not that I would complain in the first place, but anyway.

Suddenly we stop and I find that I already miss the speed and exhilaration of being so close to Edward and going that fast with no real care. I always did like flying for that very reason. We have stopped in a small yet beautiful meadow.

"This is beautiful Edward! It is very much like the one that used to be a short distance from home!" Edward smiled at me. I think that he liked, and took for a good sign, that I still referred to his home in Chicago as home.

"Yes. I come here to think when I want to be alone from my family. I also came here to think about and to remember my time with you."

That phrase seemed to hang in the air. I know it is time for us to talk. I know that we need to talk and get this behind us if we are to move forward in our relationship. Hell, I still hadn't really told him that we are married. I know that we need this, but right now all I want to do is just sit in Edwards arms like we used to. Like we are right now. Surrounded by his beautiful meadow and simply _be_with him. I don't want to think about the possibility that I might not ever have this chance again. That I might loose him again. Only this time there will be no getting him back. This time it might be forever.

"Could-could we just sit here?" He raises an eyebrow at me in question. He must know how scarred I am. He always was good at reading my moods and emotions. He said that it had something to do with my eyes. Even if he couldn't guess what I was thinking. "I just-being here-I never thought- will you just-" Tears escape my eyes and I know that he sees them as he lifts one hand to ketch them and wipe them away.

"Tell me what you want Angel? I will give you anything." I lean back into him.

"Hold me? Just for a while?" I feel him nod and he holds me closer to him. I feel safe for the first time since my so called friend ripped me from him in the past. "I know we need to talk but I just need-need to feel that you are here. That your not a dream. That your real."

He held me tighter for a moment. Then he turned me to face him. "We can take all the time you need Angel. I am not going anywhere and we have time. I need you too. I have missed you more than I have words to describe and now that you are here in my arms I am afraid that if I let you go then you will prove to be a figment of my desperate imagination."

I lean my head against his shoulder for a moment. I am a little cold but there is no way that I am moving for a very long time. I let my magic fill me to cast a wandless heating charm. Edwards words also fill me with a certain warmth. Oh how I have missed him. "Edward." I breath out. I feel him move as one hand comes to cup my face and turn it to face him. I look into his now topaz eyes and find that even though they are not the color that I remember, they are still just as full of expression as they used to be. They still looked at me with the same love that I saw in them the last time I was in his arms.

Slowly he leans down. Almost like he is waiting for me to change my mind and run screaming from him. Silly boy. I meat him half way and the kiss is like nothing we have shared before. It is tender and demanding, loving and lustful, and it is filled with every emotion that we have not been able to express of each other since we last parted. Breathing might become an issue for me but I still did not want this moment to end. We might still have a lot to talk about and work out but right now all that matters is that we are together. No matter how improbable and right now I didn't want to think about anything else but reassuring both Edward and myself that this is real.

I am forced to break the kiss and take gasps of air but it is worth it. I sink back into Edwards embrace and we simply enjoy the feeling of being together again. This is were I belong. Chicago might have been home before but now I realize that really I don't care where I am or what is happening. We could go back to England for all that I care. All that matters is Edward and the fact that I am now sitting in my husbands arms.

I am home.


End file.
